I'm here- P.PxM.J

Just let me go

Caution: Self harm and depression/anxiety/burnout/mentions (attempt) of suicide/triggering thoughts

Mj got home and slammed her front door. She felt as her whole body racked with sobs and shaky breathing. She stumbled across her house and into her room. She pushed open her door and shut it. She turned to her desk as her body and mind went numb. She didn't feel anything. She wasn't sad, she wasn't mad.. she was just there. She walked to her desk and picked up her blade.

She stumbled back to her bed and sat, then placed the blade onto her arm. Maybe if I wasn't such a pussy I would be able to do it She thought. She brought her hand down and blood started seeping out. She didn't feel anything. She looked at her blade, as if thinking about the pain would bring back the all to familiar sensation of warm blood dripping down her wrist, or the sharp pain of the cold metal cutting into the soft warm skin on her arm. The blade dropped from her hand as she felt dizzy. Your weak. It was one insult thrown at you. Your weak. Her mind screamed. She looked down and noticed how much blood was flowing. Her eyes rolled to the back of her head and she felt the sensation of falling back, then everything went black.

•••

Peter rushed into the Nurse. "Where is she?" He said, slightly out of breath. "She went home Mr. Parker." They said. He rushed out of the office, they called for him but he kept running, knowing exactly how she would react, even if they weren't that close anymore. He got closer to the apartment building and shot a web, bringing himself up. He landed on the balcony and looked in. He didn't see her. Panic rushed through his body, but he felt the familiar sensation of the hair on his arms and the back of his neck stand up. He shivered, then opened her window and climbed through.

He looked around, then turned to her bed and his eyes widened as he saw the blood seeping out of the deep cut in the arm of the unconscious girl laying down. He ran to her and lifted her up. Her body felt limp and hung back when he lifted her. He bit back the hot tears threatening to pour out of his eyes. He picked her up bridal style, then rushed out of her house and down the stairs.

He got to his apartment and laid her on the couch softly. He rushed into the kitchen and shoved a cloth on the rapidly bleeding wound. "MAY" He yelled. His aunt came running out of her wound. She saw him kneeling by the couch, but didn't see Mj. "Peter? Why are you back from school?" She asked. He looked up, "please help me" She walked closer and saw the unconscious girl. She gasped, then ran into the kitchen. She grabbed another rag and poured hot water onto it.  She tossed it to Peter and he caught it, then switched it out with the dry rag.

May rushed to her office and grabbed some stitching thread and a sterilized needle. She grabbed some Doctor scissors, then rushed back to Peter. "Move Peter. It's too deep. I have to stitch it" She said. Peter moved to the side, but stayed near Incase she woke up. May tied the thread to the needle, then cleaned around the wound and pricked the needle into her arm. Peter felt his senses go off and he looked to Mj.

She was waking up. Peter panicked. Mj groaned and opened her eyes. "What's happening?" She said, looking down at her arm. May looked up and smile warmly, then looked back down at her arm. "Hey what are you doing to me!?" She yelled. Mj didn't feel it though, she was still numb. "Shes stitching your wound." Peter said softly. Mj made eye contact as tears filled her eyes, "No. No I did that for a reason." Peter felt his lips part and he glanced at May, who was also shocked. She had finished stitching her arm and Mj hastily tried ripping them out. "No!" May and Peter yelled in unison.

He grabbed her hand and pushed it away. May sighed, "I'll let you handle her. I have to go to work" He nodded. May walked out of the house, then Peter helped Mj sit up. He sat next to her and faced her. "You.." He started, but his voice broke and tears started welling in her eyes. She still didn't feel emotion. She felt numb and empty, but she felt a slight tingle of pain and regret when she saw Peter crying. "You- I thought you were dead" He sobbed. She swallowed thickly. "I wanted to be" She said, her voice rough as low. "I don't feel anything. It's all empty. There's nothing there" She said. Peter looked at her sadly. "Mj please. You have to let me help you" He said softly, taking her hand into his. She looked down.