Saviour (an Ashley Purdy Love Story)

Chapter 13

*2 months later*

I just stared at what was going on in front of me.

And then I surprised myself by laughing. Mostly at myself, but I just cracked up laughing. Don't get me wrong, I was hurting, but I just laughed at how stupid I was. And how stupid Ash was. Seriously, in our bunk on our tour bus? Pathetic and stupid.

Ashley was just staring at me with a horrified expression that soon turned confused as I started laughing. Amy just hid under the blanket that she was sharing with Ashley, I might add.

I just shook my head as the surprised laughter continued to come out of my mouth.

Ash was shitface drunk, you could see it, but that was no excuse for what he did.

He quickly jumped out of the bunk; he still had pants on, surprisingly, and Amy just snuggled deeper into the blanket. She was also drunk. But I think she was still fully clothed, too.

But still, Ash had been laying in bed with another girl.. whether they did anything or not, that was still considered cheating.

He quickly put his arms around me. "Nothing happened," he slurred.

"Get. The. Fuck. Off. Of. Me," I said through clenched teeth. He wouldn't let go, though, so I quickly slipped under his grasp and ran for the door. The intense pain was finally starting to hit me, and it was very uncomfortable. "We're over, you drunken fucker. I'm moving out when we get back," I muttered as I ran outside. He put his hand on my shoulder, but I just turned around to see a tear fall down his cheek and remove his hand, and then took off running as he said, "Where are you going to go?" in a hurt, scared, and truly concerned voice.

"Anywhere where you aren't," I spat back at him, and then I continued to run.

The tears started falling as I stepped into a grassy feild. I didn't know where I was, where I was going, or what to do. I kept running, though. The tears were falling hard now. I couldn't see anything. But I did hear footsteps behind me.

"I swear to fucking God, Ashley, if that's you--" I began as I turned around to find Ricky following me.

"No, it's Ricky..." he said as he cautiously came closer to me. "Are you okay?" he asked.

"Yes, just peachy," I snarled. I was so pissed and I was hurting so much. I thought back over what had just happened and a wave of pain came crashing on me and I gasped for air as it knocked the wind out of me.

I started sobbing, and I just fell to the ground, too tired to even stand.

Ricky, who had a very confused, scared, and concerned look on his face, came and sat on the ground next to me. He pulled me onto his lap and rocked me back and forth as I sobbed into his shirt.

"I think... I know what... happened," he said quietly. "I saw you and Ash outside the bus, and... then I saw Amy leave... Well, Ash kind of kicked her out... Anyways, I just wanna say I'm so sorry," he said as I sobbed harder. "I'm just gonna shut up now," he muttered as he kissed my hair.

I shook my head no. "It's fine," I muttered through the tears. He then began to sing a song from his band. City Lights.

I then started laughing through the tears. What was I doing? I was again letting a boy make me feel like this.

Ricky stopped singing and looked at me. I wiped the tears from my eyes. "Is my voice really that bad?" he asked with a smile, and I just started laughing even more and shook my head no.

"I'm such a girl," I muttered as I shook my head. I just needed to get it through my thick skull; Ash and I were no more. We will never be together again. And I need to stop loving him.

And then the pain ripped through me again, but I held in the tears.

"I can do this," I muttered to myself as I tried to push the pain away.

"Hmm?" Ricky asked, not hearing me.

"It just hurts so much," I whispered as a tear came to my eyes.

"Oh, Emma, I know. But it'll get easier. I promise," he muttered into my hair.

"That's what everyone always says. But I know it's not true," I muttered. "We just become stronger, it doesn't actually get any better. We can just deal with it and we learn to push it away for longer intervals of time. But it'll always hurt. I'll never forget him. And I'll never stop loving him," I said, and let my little speech sink in. I knew it was true, but I could deal with it, right?

Ricky rubbed my arm soothingly. "You're right. But, you'll get stronger, I promise."

I laid my head on his shoulder and he started humming a song to me. It was Abigail. I chuckled. It totally fit the situation.

I stopped thinking and just let my mind go blank as I sat on Ricky's lap and he sang to me and rocked me back and forth into sleep.

Sorry it's so short and... omj this kind of sucked to write, and totally almost made me cry. I would've cried if I wasn't writing this at work (x but... what do you think will happen ? ;D You shall find out soon! Sorry it kind of sucked and stuff, but, oh well, hopefully it'll get better ;D thanks for reading <3