Thirty-Six.......A Ray Of Hope

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I don't know what was worse, the fact that I flew in hours later and Ansel was still in surgery or that I had this bad tummy ache.

After May called I searched for a flight and luckily, I found one that night. I hurriedly packed and even as I was seated on the plane, I couldn't stop shaking.

I hadn't cried once. It was until I got down from the plane that I started having this bad tummy ache.

I took a cab to the house to drop off my things. I only met Oscar and CJ at home. They were both pleased to see me and once they asked, I quickly told them what had happened and left in the same cab as quickly as I came.

I rushed into the hospital and asked the nurse for Ansel's ward but she told me he was still in surgery and had to wait.

I turned and just around the corner, I saw May and Jamie and she immediately engulfed me in a hug. We remained like that for a while before Jamie hugged me.

I sat and waited. I don't know how long I waited. I had called Meghan to let her know that I had left Manchester, she asked why I sounded so dull and I explained everything to her. She was sympathetic and did her best to make the situation brighter but I just couldn't see the bright side of anything.

It was around evening when the doctor came and May had introduced me as Ansel's wife though I didn't feel like it, I felt terrible, like the worst wife ever.

"He has suffered severe injuries. It was a very critical case and we almost lost him several times but he's now in a coma and we don't know how long he's gonna be in it. Right now all we can do is hope and pray since we have done everything we can.", he said.

Holding my stomach, I sat down. The pain was still there but it wasn't anything near the pain my heart was going through.

"Can we go and see him?", Jamie asked.
"Yes of course you can. It is said that people in coma might be able to hear those around them so yes, you can see him.", with that the doctor excused himself.

Jamie and May saw him first and after a while, I went to see him.

With shaking hands, I opened the door and froze at the sight. Bandages were all over his body. There was one around his head. His neck was in a cast. His hands were connected to drips and his face looked deathly pale. His lips were chapped and dry.

I sat down and looked at him again that was all it took and I burst into tears. I held his hand and cried on it. He was still wearing his ring.

I felt like the worst person on earth. If I had just called, if I hadn't left in the first place, maybe this wouldn't have happened.

I cried and cried wondering what he would have been thinking, was he concerned about me? He must have been worried about me and I couldn't help but think that I had done this, that it was my fault that he was in this situation.

If only, I had been here for him, with him.

/////////

It had been two months now, yes two dreadfully slow months and Ansel still hadn't woken up. At first, I didn't talk for much, I mostly replied with words.

I went back into my shell and it reminded me of when I had found out about my mum.

Caleb and Jessie visited, and Dad and Theresa also visited. Daphne visited a few times. Natalie had stayed with me for weeks, she was also saddened.

May and Jamie showed me most of their support and said they wouldn't go on their honeymoon but I persuaded them to. I told them that I would be fine and they should not let Ansel and I spoil their fun.

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