Saving Melanie Deen

Chapter 26

Stepping out of Nathan's car, I tried my best not to look at the house in front of us."Okay, you can go now. I'll be in trouble if my aunt sees some dude dropping me off" I lied, taking my backpack.

"Alright, good night" He smiled and I watched him speed away.

I looked up at the house, finally. Melanie, what the hell are you doing? I shook my head and walked right up to the front door. I knocked, waiting for God only knows what. I just hoped that she hadn't found a new boyfriend yet. That was the only thing I could think about.

The door swung open and my face met hers. She stared at me, barely keeping her eyes open. She was drunk and high, as usual. I guess she just got home from her night shift. If she still works...that is.

When I lived here, she worked at an old club as a waitress. It was a shady place, with shady people. Almost all of the staff were like my mother or worse. Cheap, drug addicts. Some were dealers. The boss was the worst. If he knew that a worker was an addict, he would sometimes pay them with cheap drugs instead of money. His club was one massive black hole. Once you get in, there's not a chance of getting out and becoming a normal person.

I frowned, looking into her bloodshot eyes.

"I knew you'd come running back to your mommy" She yawned, shuffling from one foot to the other and scratching her head. I nodded nonchalantly, stepping inside. I took a good look at every room around me, inspecting the current state of everything. The whole place was trashed. There were bottles all over the stairs, the kitchen, the living room... everywhere. I noticed a small clear package half-full of a white powder, laying on the coffee table. Was Ethan supplying those drugs? I tore my eyes off it and just shook my head, remembering Officer Hunt's words"His name is big on the streets". The whole situation with the drugs, Ethan, and my mom. It all made me sick. It was disgusting.

I refrained from grabbing the drugs and dumping them into the sink. After all, that wouldn't change anything. She would just buy more or worse, she might even call her friends over.

I turned to see my mother sprawled out on the stairs, fast asleep. Huffing, I hooked my arms with hers. I dragged her limp, skinny frame to the couch and dumped her onto it. She rolled over, muttering something under her breath. She looked dead. All jokes aside, she looked like something out of 'The Walking Dead'. I shook my head at the thought, throwing a blanket on her. From what I could see, I guessed that she didn't have a new boyfriend yet. Which made my life much easier.

I took my backpack and trudged up the stairs and right into my bedroom. Welcoming the familiar stench of beer, I dumped the backpack onto my bedroom floor. Everything was so filthy. The whole house not only looked like a trash bag, it smelt like one too.

When I lived here, I cleaned everything after every party they had. I took every chance I could get to make the whole house look normal. I desperately wanted to feel normal. I would even play pretend as a kid, that my parents made me do chores for some pocket money just like the kids at school said that theirs did. I would clean the entire house, pretending that I lived in a normal family.

To see what it had turned into was insane. I hadn't even been gone for that long, and the place was already the ultimate drug addict's den. I guess now that I was all alone again, I could go back to making an illusion of a nice family with a nice house.

With that thought, I made my way downstairs to start my mission. This will take forever to fix.

***

I fell onto my bed, shutting my eyes. The smell of fresh bedsheets made a chill run down my spine. This is it. I'm back here again. I opened my eyes, still adjusting to seeing the same old grey walls, again. The ones I woke up to every morning for the duration of my entire life. I'd be a fool if I said that I didn't miss the pastel green walls. The ones I had for a much shorter period. The ones I had at Ethan's house. Well, it was nice while it lasted. Isn't that, what I should say?

I laughed to myself, still not believing that I was back here again. I looked around at my freshly cleaned room, sighing deeply. These walls have seen and heard so much. So many screams, so many tears...so much blood. You name it, my walls probably saw it all. But this was the room I grew up in and it might sound stupid, but this was the room I felt safest in. I could always just lock the door and I was safe. All the monsters were on the other side of it.

Out of nowhere, my phone started buzzing uncontrollably. I jumped a little, startled by the sudden noise in my silent room. I looked at the screen and my heart clenched. Ethan. I grabbed the phone and turned it off, angrily. He can continue having a blast at his drug-infested event, without involving me. That was the way he wanted it, from the very beginning. I was supposed to act dumb and believe his plumbing story. That was how it was supposed to go. I wasn't supposed to catch on. Stupid me, thinking anything in my life could go another way...

I should've stayed here. I should've sucked it up and stayed here until I graduated. I should've just stuck to my plan. I should've shut up about my problems in Alisa's stupid support group. And no one would've figured it out. Ethan wouldn't have figured it out. And I would still be here like I was before. Strong and carefree. But no, I didn't do all that. So now I'm laying here at 3 am, thinking about it all like a naive 13-year-old.

Shaking my head, I got up and leaned against the window. After cleaning the entire house in two hours, I felt absolutely wrecked. All kinds of emotions were racing through my head, messing with my heart. I opened the window, popping my head out for a breath of fresh air. Just what I needed. The night's air was different. It had that calming coldness to it. The kind that made your skin crawl. It made me feel like I was alone in this world. Like there was no other living and breathing soul anywhere near me. After rough nights, that was the only thing I needed.

I sat on the windowsill, inhaling the cold night's air. I got lost in my thoughts, dreaming of what could have been...and what will never be. I looked up at one particular star, it shined in a special way. And for a second, everything else became a blur. "Melanie, your father loved you. Believe me when I say that, please". I bit back the tears, hearing the stupid voice in my head again. Louis' letter still got to me. And I don't think it will ever stop getting to me. But what good did that bring to me? My father is dead. What good did his love bring me now? If he's dead, what good did letters about his love for me bring? That's right, no good. No good at all.

Because none of it mattered anymore! He was already gone. I will never get to talk to him. I will never get to see him. I will never get to hug him and tell him I love him. Because he's dead. Gone. Never to be seen again. And I was left here, thinking about what could have been...and what will never ever be.