I AM THE EYES

HOW YOU FEEL?

it was just a 2 minute video they made for will.
swapping lives with a billionaire.
stephen would soon realise how far he'd have to go for this video.

he stood in the hotel room's bathroom, door surely locked, staring at himself in the mirror.
he was wearing a women's swimming costume.
he absolutely loathed it. he felt disgusted.
he had worked for years to gain this body and feel comfortable enough living with what he had to go through, just to be forced into this.
he felt the tears well up in his eyes.

will knocked on the door.
"you alright in there buddy?"
stephen hummed a yes. he wasn't, of course.
so he unlocked the door, and walked out.
will scanned stephen up and down, and burst out laughing.
he felt disgusted. he was absolutely appalled he'd let himself into this situation.
"mate, what the fuck!"
will blurred out between chokes of laughter.
he then gathered himself, and slowly eyed his friend until they fell to his crotch.
what stephen assumed will expected would be a bulge, of course, yknow, cause stephen was a boy, but to his surprise there was none.
no bulge.
"fuck me man you must be small huh?"
it was all a joke.
all of this was meant to be a joke.
stephens face told a whole different story.
as if some sort of ravaged animal, he tore off the costume, crying as he did so, which finally revealed what will had been laughing at.
at least, what he little thought existed.
he was wrong.

stephen was a trans man.
will had never experienced this before.
he knew of trans people, but not in his life. he saw that toby was a trans woman, some other celebrities were too, but never had he met a trans person in real life.
yet, he had, for over 5 years and never even once suspected it.
"hang on- fuck- you're a girl?"
stephens heart broke.
will saw that.
"no- fuck ste i didn't mean that, i meant-"
"i know what you fucking meant."
"no- i-"
"just shut up."
"i'm-"
"i said shut up will. i get it. i know i'm a fucking girl okay? i fucking know i am."
stephen then walked back into the bathroom, changed back into his clothing and made his way to the bed where will wasn't. he was sat at the balcony.
he got under the covers, and began scratching his arms with his nails from self hatred. tears poured from his eyes, he screamed and choked out his pain.
his best mate thought he was a girl.

will heard the scream, and walked back in to see a newly formed lump under the covers. he walked over and lifted them up, getting underneath and sitting beside stephen.
"ste, please. i am so sorry. i just didn't know- i didn't mean to say what i said, it just came out and i am so sorry. i didn't know you were a trans guy. i never even suspected. i'm sorry ste. i really am."
stephen composes himself.
"do you really mean that?"
"wh- of course i do! i love you."
"i'm sorry for not telling you."
"that's okay."
"i love you too."

sunshine streamed into stephens bedroom.
he opened his eyes, rubbing them gently, and yawning.
he lifted up the covers. there were two bumps under his t-shirt where there shouldn't have been.
it was a dream.
he hadn't undergone surgery yet.
he hadn't come out yet.

what a shame.

"sarah!"
"yeah mum?"
"come down for breakfast princess, and get ready for school."
"okay mum."