Not Again

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Brain, don't you fucking dare
Her soft lips and a sweet, no, the sweetest smile.
Stop it, god damn you!
The gorgeous ringlets of chocolate brown.
I don't want to feel anymore, just leave me alone.
The innuendos and jokes and her laugh.
Fuck. Please. I'm too tired for this.
And her way of being able to hold you when you need it,
The way she holds your hand,
The way she understands.
She's so perfect.
The way her eyes catch the sunlight and turn green.
The way her outfits are always eccentric and so fitting for her attitude.
The way her freckles are light upon her nose.
The way only her nose sweats when she gets too warm.
The way she complains about California being much too warm for her Canadian blood.
The way she can spring in heels.
I can't stop thinking and thinking and thinking about her.
God.
Get me out of my own head.
Don't make me fall in love. Again.
It hurts too fucking much and I can't have it hurt her.
Please.
Not again.

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