Parole (Hypernaturals 7)

How Do I Make This Right?

As we walked to the car, Morgan said to me sternly: "What got into you? That was not very nice. You put Holly in a bad position."

"Setting up Helen to have a bough of Holly at some point in the future? You smelled Holly. She was interested. She said she likes the way Helen makes love. She and Helen have not been together in forever."

"That poor girl. Teasing her like that." Morgan scolded. Jessica's tone of voice, now a scolding. I should be afraid, but I felt defensive and irritated.

"I was not teasing her!" I protested. "Helen has an unlimited 'get out of jail free card' with Holly. We told Helen that when we proposed to her. I wanted Holly clear on the package deal. She can have Helen, but she can't KEEP Helen. Besides, Holly is human. If they are going to have fun, it has to be now. Someday, Holly will grow up and we all will NOT, and that puts sex with her in the area of a 'limited time offer'. With you and I and our get out of jail card? I was not going to use it, unless we did what we did. We had Vampire time. You and I needed to be in a committed relationship. With Holly, that cannot be the case."

"Adrian is such a giver." Helen snarked my way.

"Oh, like you don't want to take Holly to bed." I shot back.

"I did not say that. I am not sure how to feel about the idea that my HUSBAND is OK with me cheating on him, and in fact is bloody pushing me out of his bed and into hers."

"Like with Rachel? Whatever. Talk to Jessica about that one." I told her evenly, and we got into the Pilot.

"What?" Jessica protested. "I did not say one word during that childish exchange, other than to shut your fool mouth down."

"No. But you are the one that taught me that love is love, and that I would not lose YOU by marrying Helen. You said you were confident in us. Ditto. I am confident in Helen and her love for us, and I am not afraid of her running off with Holly. Helen likes Holly. She likes having sex with Holly. It is a thing that she has that is all for just herself. If Holly rings her bell, how is that bad? You taught me all this." I continued my self-defense as the courtroom pounded at me.

Jessica shook her head as she drove "I created a monster. Sorry Helen."

Helen looked at me in thought. "No. It's OK. Ladies, if it is OK with you, may I have a crack at him tonight? Alone, I mean? I need to remind him of some things it seems. I do not mean in bed either."

Jessica waved a hand. "OK by me. I agree he needs to relearn this lesson I apparently taught him. Morgan?"

Morgan scoffed "I'm still mad at him for treating Holly that way. By all means. No matter what your relationship and confidence with Helen is or was meant to be, you did a major mind-fuck on that poor girl. In fact, I may not have sex with you until you make that right."

"How do I make that right? In your eyes?" I asked meekly

"You apologize. I mean deeply. You BEG her forgiveness." Morgan said.

I was looking at this from the point of view of US, not Holly. Morgan was pissed because of Holly. I could fight Helen all night long over it, but that is not new.

Morgan knows I should treat other people better. Human people. Human friends who don't possess inside knowledge about relative life spans and Polyamorous marriage arrangements. Morgan is right, because of course she is. I went from defensive to depressed in zero seconds. This is NOT like me. What the fuck? The way I have been treating Tommy. Not me either.

What the entire fuck is wrong with me?

"Jessica. Turn around please?" I said.

Jessica stopped the car. "You know what? I may have taught you that but I am with Morgan. In fact, just run back there and find your own damn way home."

It is not that Jessica has never been mad at me. She has. When I do stupid things. Take dumb risks. When I threw myself on the mercy of the HPA to get Vera, Morgan, and Angel back for example. She had not been happy. Rightly so as that whole thing turned out. Nothing ever like this though.

I got out of the car without another word, and Vampire sped in the dark back to the bar as the Honda drove off into the night.

As I ran along in the night, I thought about it. How did I come to change so much that I thought it was OK to do that to Holly?