Is death really the answer (calum hood fanfiction)

OMFG why does this happen to me !!!!!!!!!

If only I knew how wrong I was about today. How different things were gonna be. How everything was gonna change. How my life was gonna be different just from hearing this one peace of news

I was in business class my fist class and the only class Calum wasn't in with me.

I was dozing off in the bak of the room. Which I always do. My teacher doesn't care about me anymore they all gave up on my along time ago. As I was saying I was half a sleep until I was woken by someone hitting me.

"Lola"

I knew that voice

" what the fuck do you want Elise are you not happy enough that you almost killed me or maybe you want my to have died and was just putting that cry on so you looked innocent well guess what I don't give a shit one piss of and leave me in fucking peace "

"Jesus Lola I was just gonna say that I'm story for everything and I didn't know what you were going through because of what I'd been saying and I'm so sorry" she was almost in tears

" what the fuck you on about?"

"You know you scars"

"Oh right we'll am thxs"

I didn't wanna say that it wasn't all her fault some of it was because of Luke , Ashton and lily

"Finally I can sleep in peace" I mutter to myself

But of course I get a fucking texts from ........

"Ashton" I say abit to loud but no one notices

It says I need to talk to you ASAP it's about Luke

"Excuse me...sir can I go a toilet"

"Yeah whatever Lola but please come back by 9:30"

"Ok" I say looking out the clock it was 9 now I had half an hour.

"Ashton what's up why are you calling if you didn't know we're not best friends anymore"

"I know Lola ok and I'm sorry I know it's my fault that she's died I know but it's luke his in trouble"

"Why what has he done"

"Ever since lily died and you left his lost it. He was so inlove with you and he sleeps with these two gils each night"

"Omg what.....what's..w.w.w.whats there amm names"

"Ammm Rachel or Ruth and Lauren or louise or was it Laoise no it's Rebecca and Lisa yeah that's their names but lo he needs you please come down to my house at around 7 and help me please"

"Fine ok"

"Thxs btw I miss you "

"I miss you too but it's for the best I got to go bye ash see ya later ok"

"Bye lo and I know see ya later don't forget"

I hung up I feel so guilty it's my fault luke is like this he loved me and I loved him we were together 4/5 years and I left him because of what him and Ashton id and why lily killed herself. His sleeping with people to hide his pain. I was thinking about this all through the end of business (which was 10 mins) but it felt like years. I kept replaying this one scene in my head over and over again it was lily killing herself while I tried to stop her but I couldn't. I was to later.

"Lola"

"Hmmm what ....oh it's you hey cal"

"Hey where have you been you missed history"

"Oh shit I forgot I was dreaming"

"About what?"

"About her" I said close to tears.i didn't want to cry in front of him

"Come here it ok it wasn't your fault babe" he knew who I was on about and he hugged me tight I was to upset to realise he just called me babe.

"But ....it...it...was my fault Cal it was"trying to speak through my sobs

"Hey listen let's ditch this place and get a coffee and pizza go back to mine and talk ok "

"Ok"

"Hey Michael" Calum said to this guy with bright red hair walking past

"Yeah" Michael said

"Come here I need you to do me a huge favour mikey please"he said pouting with his puppy dog eyes. I just smiled at him

"Fin what do you want me to do""Michael said

"Tell the teachers I went home sick and if they ask about Lola say she was picked up early ok"

"Fine but you owe me calum"

"Deal see ya later" calum said putting his arm around me as we walk out to his car

"After I calmed down abit I said "cal"

"Mmmhhh"

" what time do you have to mind your sisters for because I have to go to see some old amm. Friends at 7"

"Oohhh well ammm " he was blushing"I kinda lied about that "

"What you mean "

"I don't have to mind my sisters I lied I just wanted you to come over so I could ask you out" he was so embarrassed

"Oh well I'd love to go out with you"it was my tun to blush

"Great I'll pick you up at 7 bring you to your friends and just txt me when your done and I'll bring you out ok"

" amm ok but what are you gonna do while I'm gone"

we were entering this huge house and calum ordered ham and chicken pizza my fav and stuck on the breakfast club

"I'll be setting up are date" he said getting up to get the door

"Pizzas here"

"Woohoo" I say jumping up and down after pizza and the movie we stuck on another movie I was cuddling into calum and drifting to sleep while he stroked my hair and lifted my chin

"Lola your beautiful and amazing.do you know that?"

"No I'm not"

"What yes you are and i love every piece of you "

"Even the broken and scared" I say nervously

"Especially them. You no why I love them"

"Because it proves I hate myself"

"No because it shows me how many times you needed me and I wasn't there for you" he says kissing me I could feel a tear slide down his cheek.

"When I saw you on the road.it made me realise I need to tell you how I feel before it to later and I'm happy I did"

"I'm happy you did to and I love you to cal" I say as he Burris his hea into the crotch of my neck I could feel him breath and as he did i listened to are breaths in sink