Game of Patience

Chapter 5

Chapter 5

The next few days blurred. Brooke's world stopped as the world around her moved by without her. She was pushed between meetings with different adults, where she sat nodding in the right places but she wasn't really paying attention.

People rushed by her, smiling sadly to her. She was given countless hugs. Some people said she needed space, others said she needed to be around people and busy. Brooke only needed one thing, her parents to walk through the door.

Grief is a strange thing. Everyone thinks they know what is best. They say you have to go with how you feel. But how can you, when all you feel is numbness? Like someone has punched through your chest and taken out your heart. She wanted to cry, she wanted to scream. But since the outburst in the office, no tears would come.

She sat on her childhood swing in the back garden of her house, kicking at the grass as she pushed off. The tree where her swing was tied was strong. Her dad used to play with her a lot when he was home. She remembered being chased around the tree, shrieking as he jumped out from behind it and scooped her up in his arms. He had done it the same way for years, even when she was growing way too old to be picked up anymore.

Her phone rang in her pocket but she ignored it. There wasn't anyone she wanted to talk to at the moment. She had left the station, telling Roger that she was going home to pack. But she was overwhelmed the moment she stepped inside her room. All the things her parents had bought for her over the years. Fifteen years of her life in one room. The only reason she should of been packing her things were holidays with her parents and moving with her parents. She should have had years left with them. But someone took that away from her.

Her phone rang again, but she didn't reach for it. She wanted people to stop giving her advice or telling her what to do. She wanted someone who listened, someone who cared.

She looked at the bandage wrapped around her hand. The medical team did a good job of cleaning and dressing the wound. But her hand had bled more on the dressing since. She knew she should change it, keep it clean. Yet she couldn't convince herself to stand, to move from this swing her dad had built. How long could she stay out here before anyone noticed?

The sun dropped into the horizon, sending deep beautiful colours seeping into the sky. The ground around her was painted a deep orange by the sun. It was still warm and a gentle breeze wrapped itself around her bare shoulders.

"Hey sweetheart."

For a moment she could have sworn she heard her dad calling her, she turned to see Roger walking towards her.

"If you want me to leave, I will. But I bought you pizza. It's your favourite. You can eat it now or eat it tomorrow if you want."

He stood half way, as if unsure to walk any closer. She didn't know what to say, so many things raced through her mind, fighting to be the first words she spoke. So instead she stayed silent.

"Okay well I've left it in the kitchen on the side. If you need me, call me."

He turned around and started to walk back down the path towards the house.

"Wait! Please stay. I - I don't want to be alone."

He turned back and nodded. "I'll be in the living room if you need me." He disappeared inside the house.

The light drew thinner, and the darkness settled in. The only light came from the full moon that sat proudly in the sky. Stars littered the sky and disappeared every once in a while as clouds danced smoothly across them.

She listened to the breeze, to the gentle sound of cars on the nearby roads. She listened to the world around her. No matter what happened, the world would still move. Cars were still on the roads, stars still shone and the sun would rise and set everyday.

She stood up, her legs were dead from sitting for so long, but she didn't mind the feeling so much. It was different to the numbness she felt in her chest, but even the numbness reminded her that she was still alive.

She walked inside and grabbed a plate of pizza. She slowly walked towards the living room and saw Roger sitting and reading a book. He turned and smiled as he saw her walk into the room. She took the seat next to him on the sofa and ate in silence. Roger offered to turn the TV on but she shook her head. Instead she listened to her heart, it was like it was cheering her on, a reminder to her to keep going.

She finished the slice of pizza and she hadn't realised how hungry she was, but she didn't have the energy to get another slice.

"What should I do?" Her voice was quiet, unsteady. She wasn't sure if she could speak without tears forming in her eyes.

Roger put down his book and faced Brooke, he held out his hands and waited until she placed hers in his. He then closed his hand around hers and held them gently.

"You're going to stop holding in tears and let all of it out. Then I'm going to sit here and listen to you speak. Or we'll sit and watch a film." She smiled sadly as she released the tears that had been building up. "Then I'm going to set a bed up down here and you will go to bed and try to sleep. Then tomorrow we will work on packing everything you want to take with you. The rest will go into storage. You will go to stay with George Phillips until you turn twenty one and this house becomes yours, like it's written in your parent's will."

"Why can't I stay with you?"

"Oh sweetheart, I wish you could. But I'm at work a lot and that wouldn't be fair on you. It's your parent's wishes that you stay with Mr Phillips. We can't go against that."

"But I don't know Mr Phillips. I've never met him."

"Your parents wanted you to live with him if something were to ever happen to them so that you were away from the area. From everything you know. They wanted you to have a fresh start without constant reminders of them. They want you to be happy, safe and to live your life."

She didn't reply to Roger, but he didn't seem upset by that, instead he smiled and told her to pick a film. She picked an old favourite, one she had watched many times with her parents.

She rested her head on Roger's shoulder and moved closer to him. She listened to his heart and his breathing. She closed her eyes and listened to him as he cried softly. Tears rolled down her face and onto his top, but he didn't mind. Together the pair wept for the friends and family they had lost.