🅝🅔🅦 🅑🅞🅨 🅘🅝 🅣🅞🅦🅝 [Male SuperM Member]

l o s i n g. y o u. Pt1

[AU]
🅢🅤🅘🅒🅘🅓🅔 🅦🅐🅡🅝🅘🅝🅖:
Do not read if sensitive to the subjects, if you do any harmful things to yourself or others regularly please seek help and guidance from someone wether it be a parent, teacher, friend or therapist.

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Why don't you kill yourselves already?

Why are you still here?

Do you really think anyone cares about you?

"Please stop."
He cried softly as he curled up further into the corner of his shared room. No one in the 127 dorm was here yet since they decided to go out to dinner, they didn't want to wake the boy up. Mark had left him a message  along with a snickers bar on his desk, but the fact they left without him was enough for his doubt and insecurities to feed on him.

The small plastic orange tinted bottle was about a metre away but he couldn't bring his hands to reach them, his arms were too itchy, his eyes hurt so much and he was sore all over as if he had just been in the gym the whole day. He'd been sleeping all day in fact, he couldn't bring himself it get out of bed, he had this feeling of dread and so much doubt that he thought if he didn't get out of bed no bad would happen, letting his fear eat him up for breakfast.

"Please go away..."
He whispered as the tears poured down his face. He wasn't usually like this and he knew he wasn't usually like this but sometimes everything just gets to him, all of it hits him at once and he just... can't take it...

You're not even in a group aside from SuperM, you're replaceable...

NCT127 are only nice to you since they've been forced to live with you...

You're members are drifting away from you...

They just wouldn't shut up. But he knew they were all true.
Recently no one seemed to be free, Wayv were having a comeback as well as EXO ruling out Baekyun, Kai, Lucas and Ten while Taemjn had so many variety shows to go on and interviews to do, while NCT127 were also working on a comeback meaning they had to all focus on being in the studio. Leaving Lin to his thoughts during the day, he'd contacted his manager before asking if SuperM any activities coming up only to be replied to with 'no', making him the only one with nothing.

Since he became a trainee friends outside the industry became further and further away as the months went by eventually ending in everyone graduating with friends by their side to cheer them on except him,
even his parents couldn't be there since they were still in Beijing. He was alone and scared of his future and ended up going silent and not talking about these worries as to not burden the company in fear of getting let go. Initially ending up with no friends outside the industry, meaning he had no one to turn to.

He shakily reaches for his phone around a metre away form him and tapped on his most recently called person which happened to be Henry (Lau).
"Hyung... please pick up..."
He whispered to himself as if too soothe the painful headache he bared at that moment.

"Hey, what's up?"
Henry said in his usual happy tone, you could tell he was smiling on the other end from the fact the younger called him first.
"I can't do this anymore... they're so loud..."
He whispered into the phone mic voice cracking as the tears kept on flowing down.
"Where are you now...?"
Henry asked, he was in China meaning he couldn't fly over at that moment so if he could get someone to get to Lin and comfort him it would give him enough time to make sure Lin's ok before he can get back.
"The dorms..."
Lin cried.
"Ok... I'm going to send someone over, ok? Please let them in."
Henry said, you could hear the concern and worry in his voice as he kept on the phone call. He started to whisper in Cantonese that everything was ok and that he would be ok after this.