Chapter 30

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     TIME SKIP SPLOOSH

     Eventually it was time to leave California and head back to Canada. It felt so good to be home, all my cousins fan girled over Jensen, Jj became best friends with my younger cousins and a few of family horses and vowed she'd move in with my mom, which I don't think my mom would mind at this point. She adored Jj and Jensen, like they were her own. Since she wasn't going to be at the convention, I told her my little secret. She was mad, then cried, then was happy, and now she's already decided it's a girl, gave her a name, and picked out her sweet 16 dress.

       When we arrived back in Canada, we had a police follow up, they informed us of the investigation, and everything. But honestly I didn't want to hear about any of it....His name was Jacob Ryan, he lived alone in a warehouse. His place was filled with stuff about me, all my shows, shitty movies, and photos from my social media. They found his 'diary' that his therapist made him write in everyday. He wrote about how he loved me, how we were married and how I stayed loyal....Then he wrote about how mad he was I was 'cheating' on him with Jensen in his mind....It was insane, he had cameras of my daily location, everyone's address, numbers, schedules, he was able to hack into the studios data base and find out everything, even Thomas's laptop was hacked which is probably where he got my location and etc. I never even knew this man yet he knew me very, very well....

      I still had issues sleeping or going anywhere alone....To me he was still very much alive. I moved out of my apartment and moved in with Jensen, he didn't want me to be alone and I was okay with it. We were considering on getting a dog, like I mentioned months ago and now that the drama was over it'll be nice. Though I was concerned that he wasn't ready for the baby, I kept my plan to tell everyone in New York. Wherever I went there was paparazzi, rambling on with questions about the shooting, my health, Daneel, Jj, and so much more. It was overwhelming, for some reason I thought the world would just move on and forget it happened. Unfortunately that was the complete opposite. Maybe it'll slow down soon...

     Jensen and I had just come home from physical therapy, my body ached and I was exhausted. My arm was finally out of my sling, and my leg cast was gone but it was still sore and I limped a lot. I sat on the couch while Jensen warmed up some left over soup for lunch. As I sat there beginning to fall asleep, I couldn't help but notice something move out the corner of my eye. I lifted my head to see a man in our backyard. My breathing stopped, my heart was about to burst out my chest, and I began to hyperventilate.
         "J-J-JENSEN!!" I scream, trying to get off the couch as fast as I can. I hear him run into the living room and I rush towards him the best I can. Tears were streaming down my face, as my hyperventilating worsened.
       "Baby baby breathe breathe. What's wrong?" He asked, trying to calm me down from my panicked state.
        "H-H-He's i-i-in the the the-" I couldn't get a damn sentence out, I grew frustrated and cried more.
        "Baby slow down."
        "HES IN THE BACKYARD." I finally blabber out. He quickly rushes to the back door, yells something out I can't hear and groans in frustration coming back towards me. He sweeps me up bridal style and takes me upstairs, he hasn't said a word. He sets me down on the bed, and kneels in front of me. My hands were shaking and I couldn't calm down. "He's outside Jensen I saw him, he isn't dead!!" I cry out. Jensen sighs and grabs my face, making me look at him directly.
       "Sweetie......it was paparazzi...I will call the community head guard and see if they can do something about security but it was not the man from before." He informs me in a soothing tone. His eyes showed pain, and concern I probably looked insane to him.
       "I'm sorry I thought-I'm sorry I'm sorry." I begin to ramble, continuing to cry even though it was for a completely different reason.
        "Shhh shhh it's okay. You've been through a lot. I know your scared. We can get through this." Jensen replies. I nod and close my eyes taking deep breaths to calm down. "Take a nap baby. Get some rest." Jensen instructs me. I nod and get under the covers, cuddled up in his large bed. How long will I be like this?....

      The next day, after Jensen talked to someone about security he left to run some errands. Luckily, Thomas had to come over to discuss schedules so I wouldn't be alone.
       "So now that your with daddy Jensen and you live in this godly mansion when are you gonna buy me some Gucci?" Thomas asked as he sat at the kitchen island counter. I laughed and shook my head.
       "You have money. Get your own Gucci."
        "Mm but I don't wanna spend money."
       "Sounds like a you problem darling." I laugh. He laughs and shakes his head before pulling out his laptop. I hand him a glass of wine and he begins informing me about my schedule.
       "So next week we are heading to New York, we will be there for 2 days for the convention. Day 1 is photo shoot, then table talk where you'll sit with the entire cast and answer questions, and then that evening you have a cast party fun fun fun. Day 2 is meet and greet, Q&A with Karaoke, then after New York back here for filming and tthhheeennnnn it's the holidays so your going to Texas then California for New Years. Also I have some houses lined up so when you go to Texas they'll be ready for you to look at and find your forever home with Mr.Ackles annndddd after New York sometime I'll schedule you a doctors appointment so we can make this baby thing official!" Thomas cheers. I roll my eyes and chuckle.
       I chuckle and place my hand on my stomach, you couldn't tell I was even pregnant but it felt different to me at least. Thomas to roll his eyes. He then looks over the counter at my stomach and smiles.
      "I hope it's a girl." He comments. I look down and chuckle gently placing my hand on my stomach.
      "I kinda of want a boy. Since we have Jj." I respond. He nods and rests his elbow on the counter, his chin in his hand.
      "Jj adores you. That little girl wouldn't stop blabbering about you....I'm glad things worked out. That was a hot mess before." Thomas chuckles. I scoff and nod, thinking about all the crazy shit we went through. "How's physical therapy going?" Thomas asks me, snapping me out of my thoughts.
        "Good, not as bad as I thought. The pain is slowly going away." I shrug.
       "And how's psych going?" He asks me, causing me to look at him directly. He knew me too well, he knew I was damaged. I sigh and fiddle with the counter, tracing the marble patterns with my finger nail.
        "Fine."
        "Just fine?"
        "I don't know.......Everywhere I go I see him. In the crowds, the shadows, the backyard, everywhere Thomas....it's like he never died. He's just waiting." I run my fingers through my hair and groan in frustration.
        "You know he is. You saw the paper work for yourself y/n."
       "But if he isn't?!? Like they lost the body or he escaped!?!?" I protest.  
       "Girl. You sound like Laurie Strode from Halloween talking about Michael Myers." Thomas comments. I can't help but laugh and listen to what I'm saying. He's right. I need to stop. He's dead. He's gone. And I can live my life now. I had to be ready for New York and the first thing that needed to be done, was move on.
"Your right I'm sorry just.....how do you move on from shit like that? Do they have a book or something?" I sigh.
"Yeah it's called stop being a dummy for dummies and grow a pair. You are Roxy. Roxy from supernatural, you fight demons and monsters and he was just another spooky creature that you defeated." Thomas says in a confident tone causing me to laugh and nod. I guess he was right, he was my real life monster and now he's gone. Forever.

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