Dear Diary

Chapter 16

A loner's life can be, as the word implies, very lonely, and nothing amplified this fact more than the hour known as break time. Sophia had long since given up on trying to sit in the cafeteria. By nature, she was more of an outdoor person anyway, and she had been fortunate enough to attend schools that had large trees dotting every field here and there.

Ridgeview was a very forest-like town and so, much to Sophia's delight, there were many massive, old trees on campus where she could retreat to quiet solitude and eat her home-made lunch in peace.

Although Sophia desperately wanted friends, she has been living in her own little bubble for so long, that the thought of actually conversing with someone over non-school related topics unnerved her slightly. People could say she's lost her confidence in her own socializing ability - to an extent.

It was a very confusing topic for her. She wanted friends that she could confide in, but at the same time ... not. If she spoke to people, she would have to open up eventually, and people will find out too much about her - which she didn't want. Hence, why she just gave up on being friendly and forced herself to give off a don't-mess-with-me vibe. She didn't want people to know how messed up her life was.

However, some people never seem to take a hint.

"Sophia!"

Upon hearing her name, Sophia looked up from her position of leaning against the trunk of a massive yellowwood to see Luke walking towards her with his ever-present grin in place. 

Sophia observed him silently as he gradually closed the distance between them. He definitely had confidence and gave one a friendly feel, but Sophia was a bit curious as to why he was approaching her, and alone at that. He always had a posse with him; be it male or female.

"I was wondering where you disappear to during break. I never see you in the cafeteria."

He's been looking for me. Sophia noted in her mind as he came to stand in front of her. The shade of the ancient tree made his brown hair and blue eyes appear darker, and the light blue shirt he wore brought out his prominent tan.

"I don't like the noise," Sophia stated calmly, not showing her confusion at his random approach nor the fact that she was unsettled by him looking down at her.  

She was looked down on by her father enough as it was, but she resisted the urge to stand so that she didn't feel as small.

Luke shrugged. "Fair enough."

It was quiet between them for a moment. Luke shifted his weight onto one leg, and stuffed his hands in his pockets. "So ... my mom was wanting to know what you would like to eat on Sunday."

Now Sophia couldn't help but show her confusion. "Sunday?"

Luke's brows furrowed slightly as he looked down at her, grin slipping. "Yeah, yesterday after church my parents invited you and your dad over for Sunday lunch this weekend. Your dad said he couldn't make it, but said he would discuss it with you."

Sophia realised a few things with Luke's words: firstly, Luke must know that her mother passed because he never mentioned her and secondly, the fact that her father never uttered a word to her about having lunch with the Woods. Not only that, but he won't be present anyway. It stung a little, knowing that he never bothered to discuss things with her that actually concerned her.

Luke shifted to his other leg as his frown deepened. "I guess he didn't tell you?"

Sophia snapped out of her thoughts. "No, he did. Sorry, I forgot about it momentarily."

She didn't know why she just defended her father: probably not to make Luke suspicious. Yes, that was it. 

"I'm ... fine with anything," she replied, her face revealing nothing of her gloomy thoughts.

Luke nodded at her response and the smile returned to his face.

"Cool, see you in class."

-

That evening raindrops streamed down the glass of Sophia's bedroom window as she sat cross-legged on her bed, textbooks surrounding her. Apparently, the teachers went easy on them the first week. Now all hell broke loose.

Tests were beginning in two weeks time and the teachers, specifically Mr Evans, seemed to find great pleasure in over-loading them with homework and tasks. Sophia wasn't sure what his problem was. Even for someone as smart as herself, Sophia was not study-immune. She had to put in the hours too.

But no matter how pressing her schoolwork was, she couldn't help but think back to the conversation she had with Luke earlier today.

The invitation had been random. The Woods had only just met Sophia and her father, and have already invited them over for Sunday lunch. Either they were just those overly-friendly type of people that beckoned newcomers into their home or ... they were the kind to pity the fact that Sophia's father was a widower, and that she was motherless.

Sophia's grip tightened on her pen. She despised pity more than anything else in the world. If people pity you, it makes you feel and appear weak. Sophia hated feeling weak. The only person who was allowed to see Sophia weak was ... herself. Besides, how did pity ever get anyone anywhere?

But despite her conflicting thoughts, Sophia guessed it might not necessarily be a bad thing to go to this Sunday lunch. Luke seemed quite excited that she would be going, and it made her heart feel a little lighter. No-one ever seemed excited to see her, except for her Aunt Tess.

Another advantage of going to this lunch, Sophia noted, was that she'll have a home-cooked meal for a change. Who knows the last time she's had one. Her father obviously never cooked for her and she almost never saw her Aunt Tess . Hardly enough time to teach her how to cook a proper meal.

Sophia had tried to teach herself on a number of occasions, but she always ended up with more waste and dishes than anything else. Eventually, she just gave up and bought already cooked meals from shops instead. It saved her time and doing a considerable amount of dishes.

Sophia sighed as she leaned back against her pillows and watched lightning flash across the sky as the rain pelted against her bedroom window. If Sophia had been any less disciplined, she wouldn't have thought twice about skipping school tomorrow. Driving a bike on wet roads is no joke after all, but she was the daughter of the perfect General. Therefore, perfect attendance was compulsory.

Sophia shifted so that she lay on her side. Sometimes, only sometimes, does she wonder that if her father was never a General ... would he still have treated her the same?