Dear Diary

Chapter 76

The whole ride home I was as silent as the grave, my mind completely blank as I stared out the window at the passing shadows the lampposts created. I was seated in the back of the Mercedes as Ronan drove Richard and I back to my house.

When I had basically ran away from Cole, I found Richard as quickly as I could and glued myself to his side. He didn't even realise I was using him as a shield as we said our final good-byes and left the hall a few moments later. Thankfully that was the final dance of the night, so I managed to hide in the crowd quite easily as we left. 

One of the perks of being short.

Ronan had asked about my quiet behaviour, but I only replied that I was tired. Richard then went on to explain how long we danced and Ronan then understood, although he was also shocked by my ability to dance.

When we arrived home I wasn't surprised to see Richard's family in the living room talking to my family. After a few minutes of polite small talk, I excused myself to go and shower. While I was busy rubbing all the make-up off my face, everything suddenly hit me like a truck and I slid down the wall of the shower, my back pressed against the cold tiles as the warm water from the shower-head washed over me.

"Stupid, stupid, stupid," I muttered and ran a hand down my face. 

He never liked Amy ... he liked me. How could I have not seen it? He fought for me, helped me, and opened up to me. Why did I not see it coming? It took him nearly kissing me for me to realise his feelings.

A sudden rush of tingles washed over me, reaching down to the tips of my toes and a giddy smile forced its way onto my lips. Cole likes me. My crush likes me!

But then I frowned and bowed my head as the smile slipped from my face. Maybe ... maybe he didn't mean it? My heart clenched at the thought as I pressed my hands to my face. I felt my stomach twist in knots.

He was acting strange. Maybe he was high on something? His pupils were dilated ... Isn't that a sign? But I've never seen him take drugs, only smoke. Can you get high from smoking? Isn't that a relaxant though?

I groaned, feeling the sudden urge to punch the tiled wall. I was working myself up over this so much that a painful stitch was beginning to form in my side. I stood and tried to stretch it out, but my stomach was such a bundle of nerves that it hardly eased the muscles.

I grabbed the bottle of shampoo and squirted a dollop on my head, wincing when some got in my eye. Great, I can't even do normal tasks I'm so distraught over this.

I forced myself to take deep breaths to calm myself down and I heard a knock on the door. "Lizzy, is everything okay in there? You've been in there a while," I heard my mom's muffled voice call.

"Yes, I'll be out soon," I called back, hoping she didn't hear the trepidation in my voice.

I threaded my hands into my hair as I began to wash out the hairspray which had kept my curls in place. I don't know what was going to happen when I return to school on Monday, but I know what I was planning on doing either way.

Avoid Cole at all cost.

-

Saturday and Sunday went by quickly, much quicker than I wanted, because Monday is when I run the risk of bumping into Cole. It was a little easier said than done, but basically if I saw him in the hallway, I quickly diverted my path to another without being spotted.

English was more difficult though ... considering he's in my class. I was deadly quiet as I waited for Mrs Eley to begin teaching and I ignored Cole's presence by burying my nose deep into my literature book.