The heart of the ocean

⚓...S.O.S...⚓

Tuesday:

That day we had our first class meeting. For many days there has been talk about how our class was not completely united, about our school progress, and that we would never be able to continue to study other languages if we didn't know our language before.
We talked about how the class was separate, because in addition to me and Manar, there were also other very isolated people like Sandrine and Corinne.
Corinne was a very reserved girl, she had many problems in her family, she dressed in a lively way, but this was perhaps just a camouflage of all the insecurities and all the problems that she carried only inside a corner of her heart. We started talking and getting to know each other better that day.

During chemistry class, we all moved to a different class, Corinne and I sat next to each other, and all the time we talked, writing on a little book notes. I wanted to get to know her better, know what made her feel so alone and misunderstood. I could have helped her, we could have been friends, we had so much to talk about. I too have always had problems in the family, it was not easy to grow up in an ambit of psychological terror, where you have to pretend nothing for events happened at the time of my birth. My mother didn't find out the truth, and no one including my father has ever wanted to tell her.

We had a similar story, or rather I associated all the pain she felt with mine. I wanted to help her in some way,'cause I wanted to make her feel safe, let her know that she would have passed everything. But then something broke between us...

At the start of the class reunion, Natasha and Josh started talking about school progress, and then I felt immediately involved, from the moment Natasha started talking about the fight between David, me and Jacob. She said that what had happened was something out of the world, that raising hands was a sign of rudeness, that one could speak without resorting to such gestures, that nothing serious had happened and that therefore it was only necessary to talk to the parents.

She tried to make me look bad, as if she wanted to defend them, that moment was just another demonstration of what I thought, she was totally in love with Jacob and defended him as the most important person in her life. It was as if I felt a shower of nails over my body, every word she said was making me feel worse and worse.

I felt like all my classmates were pointing arrows at me, arrows full of hate on my face, I felt trapped and I didn't know what to do, I just wanted to run for my life. At some point, he asked David and I to stand up and approach the professor desk in front of everyone. I didn't know what he was planning, what his intention was.

All our classmates started talking to each other, they were all pretty freaked out, maybe they were afraid that everything that had happened could happen again. David and I approached her with our heads down, as if we'd been convicted in court. He put us in front of each other, and he and I couldn't even look into each other's eyes. It seemed that at any moment there would be a show between lions released from a cage, with only fire in our irises, and spectators all sitting in the front row.

At that moment someone knocked at the door, the Italian teacher, who hearing all those voices, decided to suspend the assembly sending us all in our place. I sighed of relief, as if I had freed myself from those shoes full of nails after a long walk, I felt free to fly towards my path, barefoot, I could see the rainbow after all that suffering.

The next day, the Italian teacher asked David and Jacob to leave the classroom, we all looked each other in the eye, we were afraid. As soon as they came back I was called along with Manar, I did not understand the reason she called her from the moment she was not part of it, I did not even understand why she had not called us four together, but only separately, as if she was arranging to protect them.

Once out of class, the teacher asked us what happened.
I told her everything and why I had acted in that way. I had to defend myself, defend my dignity, my face. She said that everything had worked out and that she didn't think there was a need to call all our parents, that doing so would create a futile hatred for such a small thing, that these things happen. I had to hold on to all that pain, and as the days went by, it kept increasing like a decaying fruit.