Maid For You 3

Chapter 69

"A lot of things," I said. "You know, I was realizing that so much has happened since I first came to Aregano. I mean, I showed up with no job and no friends, and now I'm somehow a lady-in-waiting. I've gotten to know the Queen of the country and meet the King, I've become friends with royalty and nobility—I mean, it's crazy, you know? I really didn't foresee this at all."

"Things certainly have changed," he said.

"And look at us, huh?" I said, a wry smile on my face. "We're actually getting along. We're being friendly."

He smiled lightly. "Yeah."

I moved onto my back again and closed my eyes against the blindingly bright white sky. "I also was thinking about Luke," I said. "We still haven't really discussed what happened at Calista's debutante ball, and it's hanging over me. I think I'm going to just go talk to him today and get that conversation over with."

Coleman was quiet for a moment. "I see."

"Then we can move past it," I said.

"So," he started. "You still want to date him?"

"Yes," I answered.

"Even after all that?" he asked. "I mean, it seems like he still has feelings for Marstella."

"He told me that he doesn't love her."

"Then he's a liar."

"That's why I need to talk to him," I said, sitting up from the chilly snow. "To sort things out once and for all. Hopefully we'll work things out. But...but maybe we won't."

I had hope, however. Afterall, he had agreed to play at Madeline's party, and he did look truly remorseful when we'd talked at the ball. Coleman and I returned back to the palace shortly after that conversation—I guess neither of us felt like playing in the snow together anymore.

***

That night, I heard a soft knock at my door, and I knew who it was. I got up to open the door and found Luke standing there in his butler uniform, his eyes soft and mouth still.

"Hi Luke," I said. "Thanks for coming."

He nodded. "I'm glad you texted me. Really, I am." I let him in the room, and we sat next to each other on the bed.

"What have you been up to while we've been here?" I asked him, opting to start out with some small talk.

"I've had a lot of free time," he told me. "And I brought my guitar, so I've been practicing the music that Lady Madeline's assistant emailed me."

"You have?" I asked, surprised at the glimmer of excitement I suddenly felt.

He smiled and turned to me. "I have," he said. "Honestly, it's been nice to spend so much time practicing music. It's gotten me excited for her party."

"Really?"

He reached over and took my left hand in his right, "Really, Cassie," he said. "And I'm glad that you got this opportunity for me. I'm sorry I was too prideful and stubborn to see that before."

I smiled lightly. "Well, you weren't totally in the wrong. You brought up fair points yourself, and I'm sorry I got so defensive." I squeezed his hand. "I am networking, but I don't really know what for. I guess, I feel kind of lost. I don't have a burning passion, I guess. Maybe I need to start writing again. I don't know. I was planning to write a lot when I got here, but I've been distracted."

Nikolas's words echoed back to me. You don't want to write about adventures, you want to live them. I wasn't sure if they were completely true.

"I believe in you," Luke said, smiling. "Really, I do. I've been untrusting, and for that I'm sorry."

"I understand," I said. "But I really am here for you, Luke. You're my number one, you got that? All of these guy friends of mine? They're just that. Friends."

He nodded.

Honestly, this whole conversation was going much better than expected. However, there was still one issue I didn't want to ignore.

"Luke?" I asked.

"Yes?"

"Marstella..." I started.

"I know," he said quietly, looking down at his lap. "The truth is, I did love Marstella once, it's true. And, and I'd be lying if I said I felt absolutely nothing for her. But, well, I've been thinking about it a lot, and honestly, I think I was in love with a person who didn't exist. I thought it was hard to let of Marstella, but really, it's hard to let go of this warped idealistic fantasy of her. The truth is, I didn't know Marstella. I thought, in my head, that she was a certain person, but she isn't. I'll be honest, I liked her from the moment I met her, but she saw that. She needed me to like her, so she made herself into the person I wanted. I mean, I'm sure she wasn't all fake all the time—she was witty and clever and all that, but I can't accurately discern what was real and what wasn't."

He laughed drily. "We dated for six months and in all that time we never even had an argument." Luke shook his head. "I thought it was because we were so perfect for each other, but it's because she wasn't real. She was just an illusion." His eyes then met mine. "Yes, there may be some residual feelings for her there somewhere inside of me, but it's you I like, Cassie. You are real and honest and I love that. And we may argue at times, but I'd rather have that than some mirage of a relationship."

I looked at him thoughtfully. His answer wasn't all that I had hoped for, he didn't tell me that he felt nothing for Marstella and it was all just a fluke, and yet, that would have been a lie and I'd have known it. He was right; our relationship wasn't perfect, but it was real. Besides, how could I totally blame him for having residual feelings for someone when I would catch myself staring at Coleman for a moment too long, or heck even how my heart nearly freaking died when Prince Nikolas smiled at me. It was hypocritical for me to harbor tiny traces of feelings for others while expecting Luke to feel otherwise.

I smiled. "Thank you for being honest," I said. "You know, I think it's easy to romanticize that a relationship will be conflict-free and happy-go-lucky all the time—I know that I've certainly thought that in the past. However, real relationships take work. We're not always going to be happy with each other, but that's okay. We make it work."