-Love In A Life Of Sin✔️-

Chapter27- The 'Break'

BEYS POV

I laid in bed in my tshirt and pyjama shorts, thinking about life and staring at the wall. I couldn't stop thinking about how much my life has changed. How much I've been through in the last year and how much I have had to sacrifice. All for what? Some guy. I only this guy WAS just some guy. I feel like I should hate him, but I know I can't.

I started to think about the relationships Ive had to throw away or weaken for shawn. My dad's gone, my mom hates me, solange is still salty about Chris, Kelly and Michelle don't even try to talk to me anymore and the rest of my family have practically disowned me. It really is just me and Shawn now.

The worst thing is, the one person I'm left with can't stop hurting me.
Continuously letting me down and disappointing me. It can be really overwhelming at times, Thinking about my situation. It makes me hate shawn. I quickly tried to clear those thoughts; my mom always told me never to have hatred In your heart. Truth is, my love and hatred for shawn are filling my heart and coexisting together at the same time.

Just as tears started to form in my eyes, I heard the door swing open. I looked over to see shawn stumbling over to my bed. He climbed in under the covers and cuddled up beside me, wrapping his arms around my waist and pressing his front on to my back.

"Shawn..."

"I can't sleep. I know you can't either. I've been listening to you talk to yourself for the last 5 minutes."

"damn. Why can't you sleep?" I said moving out of his grip.

"Because you're not pressed against me, and because I can't feel you near me. I can't kiss you and tell you how much I love you until you fall asleep." He moved his arms back around me and trapped me in his warmth. I can't lie and say it wasn't comforting and soothing.

"This is defeating the whole concept of a break." He nuzzled his face In my neck and kissed it.

"Just one night bey. Please? Just let me hold you for tonight." I couldn't steady my quivering jaw for any longer and I ended up letting a tear fall on his battered muscly arm. "Don't cry princess. I don't like when you cry."

"So then why are you always cause of my tears?" I immediately regretted the words as soon as they passed my lips. Shawn rested his chin on my shoulder and sighed.

"Because I'm a Piece of shit." He tightened his grip on me as I turned around in his embrace, causing me to face him. I looked up at him.

"things are going to get better princess. I promise. No more pain and suffering. Just you and me.. And this break..thing." I giggled and threw my leg over him. I could already feel the effects of his love warming me into a deep slumber.

"shawn?"

"I need you to make a serious serious serious promise now. Like if you break this we're done."

"I'm listening."

"Promise me you'll never stop loving me.." There was silence for a minute.

"...I promise."

***
JAYS POV

I woke up the next morning with screaming filling my ears. Screaming and sobbing coming from the beautiful body next to me, curled up into ball. I pushed her hair off her face and tapped her. I didn't want to startle her because I knew we weren't on the best terms.

"Bey, baby wake up."

"Help me! Help somebody stop him!" She sobbed more hysterically.

"Baby your okay, your safe. Wake up.." Miss Tina told me that bey used to get these a lot and that If they got real bad, sometimes she would work herself into a panic attack. From her loud screaming and the painful, sharp breaths she was struggling to take, I knew this was one of those time.