Chapter 9

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(Seina's POV)
The following week began like any other.
The twins were prancing around the club room, wearing matching flat caps playing the 'Which one is Hikaru? game'. The customers were undoubtedly struggling until Haruhi wandered by and identified them easily. She then proceeded to muse over what exactly their attraction was. I tried to stop her but it was too late.
They promptly launched into a lengthy explanation of their appeal as hosts, complete with various poses showcasing their twincest. They then grabbed one of their unsuspecting customers and began seducing her, whispering in her ears and touching her face as they talked about the intensity of being loved by two beautiful people at once. Then as if an after thought, 'And of course it's forbidden.'
I raised my eyebrows. As if they didn't believe that was the true appeal.
A shrieking noise came rushing towards us and we all turned to see Tamaki-senpai clutching a laptop. 'Hikaru! Kaoru! I let you have control of the club web page on the condition that you took it seriously!' The redheads looked at him innocently.
'We take it very seriously. We were up all night working on it.' It was then that Tamaki-senpai opened the laptop to reveal a shot of Haruhi, shirtless, taken from behind.
'This is not acceptable!' The ever excitable fans seemed to disagree, gushing over the image even as Haruhi seemed to be going into shock and Tamaki-senpai was dramatising at the twins.
'Did you bribe her with sushi? Is that how you did this to my poor, sweet little girl? How could you!?' The twins exchanged an exasperated look.
'Tamaki-senpai where is your mind? We used photoshop.' Somehow this seemed to distress Tamaki-senpai further.
'Idiots! Fools! Why would you waste your skills? You should have photo shopped her wearing these cute clothes!' He brandished an idol magazine. The twins frowned at him.
'Why don't you just ask her to wear the clothes?' This had Tamaki-senpai sidling over to Haruhi, a frilly little top in hand.
The fangirls were quick to agree that Haruhi would look adorable in female clothing. Of course they didn't know how right they were. Eventually Haruhi regained her composure, sending Tamaki-senpai running with a look. She then turned on the twins.
'Please don't edit my image. What exactly am I to you two?' An evil grin found it's way onto each of their faces.
'That's obvious. Our toy.'
The argument that ensued was loud enough to attract the attention of the Black Magic Club. In a matter, of seconds their club president Nekozawa-senpai was skulking in the doorway, attempting to promote the sale of his Belzenef curse dolls which he felt could be categorised as 'toys' and attract new club members.
Tamaki-senpai looked horrified while Kyoya-senpai calmly explained that Nekozawa-senpai is afraid of bright light.
'You should stay away from him.' Tamaki-senpai whispered from behind, causing Haruhi to jump out of her skin.
'If you are connected to him in any manner you will be cursed without exception!' She looked nervous.
'On what grounds do you say that?'
'It was last year during the final exams. It is scary even to think of. I was walking down the corridor like any other day when I stepped on a Belzenef doll! Then my test was filled with mysterious, curse like words I couldn't understand. I looked around and found myself in a different dimension full of people I'd never seen!' Honey-senpai was crying.
'Scary! Is it true?'
Kyoya-senpai sighed. 'You went into the Greek exam by mistake.'
'No! It was a curse! My feet were heavy as lead for three days.'
'You had run a marathon the day before.'
It was then that Nekozawa-senpai cut in. 'The power of the curse doll Belzenef is real. Write the name of someone you hate on the back and they will suffer great misfortune.'
I was about to confront Nekozawa-senpai about his claims considering Kyoya-senpai was still alive and breathing but the twins had other plans. Before I could say anything they ran at him with torches, causing the older student to flee the room. Tamaki-senpai was beside himself.
'Hikaru! Kaoru! What have you done? You do not know the horrors of black magic!' The twins walked away from him before he could finish, bored of his nonsense. He withdrew to a corner to sulk.
The twins sidled up to Haruhi. 'Can we come to your house in the next holiday?'
'Why?'
'We're curious.'
'No. You'll make fun of me.'
'Please.'
'No.'
'Even if we beg?'
'I said no.'
Tamaki-senpai brightened up at this idea. 'I was thinking of greeting your parents.'
'Definitely not.' The twins reclaimed her attention.
'Ok, let's play the 'Which one is Hikaru? game' If you lose, we get to come to your house as a penalty.' Either Haruhi was confident she'd win or she was resigned to her fate as she didn't protest.
The two then did their level headed best to disorientate her. They finally came to a standstill in front of her.
'Which one is Hikaru?' She didn't even think about it before correctly naming each twin. 'You're wrong!' They shouted gleefully but she shook her head at them.
'No I'm not. You may look the same but you two are different.'
For once the pair were speechless. The guests were naturally fascinated by this apparent magic trick and demanded to know exactly how she knew. She thought about it for a moment before concluding.
'Hikaru's mannerisms are meaner than Kaoru's.' I was wise enough to bite my lip at this stage but Kaoru began laughing.
'I'm sorry Hikaru.' Hikaru was quick to defend himself.
'I'm just trying to be sincere. Kaoru is the truly ill natured one.'
'Don't just say whatever you want! I'm the one who has to put up with your selfishness all the time.'
'I may have brought it up but you're the one digging a deeper hole. Don't like it? Then stop. Are you stupid or something?'
'I couldn't help but see you being dumber. Besides, you say Haruhi is just a toy to us but really you like her! You make a pass at her every time you get a chance.'
'Like you don't! You're only saying that because you can't have Seina and you think no one will notice you like Haruhi!' Me and Haruhi exchanged a glance and shuffled uncomfortably. Whereas Tamaki-senpai was becoming hysterical.
'Kaoru, some things should not be said!'
Hikaru was not finished. 'Why would I like a short fox like Haruhi?'
'Don't call her that.'
There was a thunderous mechanical noise from beneath the club room and Renge appeared, spinning up out of the floor.
'Beautiful! Just beautiful! A painful four sided relationship revolving around Haruhi! And two are twins! What a predicament! Renge can eat three bowls of this with rice.' The twins scowled at her. 'Get lost you otaku.' She fell to her knees dramatically, apparently wounded by their words. Tamaki-senpai offered her his hand.
'I thought you liked Haruhi, Renge-san?'
'The climate demands a different stomach for these sort of things.' Haruhi then inquired as to why she was not in France, unsurprisingly it turned out Europe was not ready for a host club.
In the meantime the twins had begun arguing again.
'I've had it with you! Always sneaking into my bed, you're so annoying.'
'I only slept in your bed because you looked lonely and vulnerable. You idiot!'
'Who are you calling an idiot? You're worse at maths than me!'
'Well you should study Japanese more!'
'Obnoxiously noisy!'
'You sleep weirdly and fall out of bed!'
'Erotic imp!'
'Pervert!'
They then yelled in unison. 'At least I'm better than you! I'm not talking to you!'

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