Chapter 35

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(Seina's POV)
The next day, Kasanoda-kun turned up at the host club and requested Haruhi. Who everyone else believed to be a boy. There was loud shrieking from the usual crowd of customers who had been watching his progress through the club intently. Things were certainly getting interesting.
Renge-san came spiralling out of the floor and began enthusing about poor Kasanoda-kun's obvious crush on Haruhi. 'Has it at last arrived? The genuine article?' This in turn psyched up the usual collection of neurotic lunatics who frequented the host club and had never met a gay man. Little did they know that they still hadn't.
'Casanova-kun welcome! You're our guest today right?' Haruhi asked cheerfully, settling a tea set down in front of him and busying herself with making the tea.
'Yeah...'
'Is tea alright? You don't mind something sweet?'
'Here I'll help!'
'No that's alright. You're our guest after all.' He zoned out for a minute and Haruhi leaned in close to him. 'Sir, is this your first time in this sort of establishment?' Needless to say he jumped out his skin even as she chuckled at him. 'I'm just kidding.' She was certainly getting bold.

The conversation continued on in this manner as I made my way over to the twins who were seething in a corner. 'Are you guys ok?'
'Of course we are!' They snapped at me, gnashing their teeth angrily.
'Naturally I believe you guys.' I said sarcastically. 'You just seem a tad tense is all.' Kaoru chewed sulkily on his lip and Hikaru glowered at me.
'Well if your fiancé would just kindly get rid of him we wouldn't be! Come on Kyoya-senpai! Hurry up and chase that guy out of here!'
'If he's getting along better with his men then there's no reason for him to be here right?' Kaoru reasoned.
Kyoya was scribbling away in his notebook, not giving the twins the time of day. 'He appears to be keeping Haruhi's secret, and since he is here as a guest what reason do we have to refuse him?'
'The other guests are afraid of him!' The twins shrieked.
'He's ok as far as that goes. Thanks to him our take today might set a new record.' Indeed, even as Kyoya spoke more girls were flooding into the clubroom.
'So that's what you're after you moneygrubber!' They raged back at him.
They returned to their position behind one of the support columns, watching her with growing concern. 'What's she doing giving him that adorable smile? That naturally precocious girl!'
'Don't you think you guys are overreacting just a little?' I asked.
'No! We are definitely not!'
'He seems like a nice guy and Haruhi likes him.'
The twins looked pointedly between Kasanoda-kun and Kyoya. 'You have terrible taste in men.' Kyoya raised an eyebrow at me in a way that suggested he was going to remember that comment.
Honey-senpai then came dancing over in a cloud of flowery moe. 'Hika-chan, it's unlike you guys not to go in and interrupt huh?'
Both boys turned to face the older student. 'After our screw up in Karuizawa, we can't afford to act thoughtlessly and do something that might make Haruhi mad at us.' Hikaru answered.
Kaoru narrowed his eyes at his brother. 'Not 'ours' that was all 'yours', right Hikaru?'
Caught out, Hikaru decided to change the subject, rounding on Tamaki-senpai who was curled up at the base of the column. 'Hey sir, how long are you going to remain a husk of yourself?'
'It's in times like this that we need our king to step up, don't we?' Kaoru added.
They then each grabbed one of his arms and thrust him in the right direction. 'Go get 'em!'

Unfortunately, Tamaki-senpai was still recovering from his significant emotional and mental trauma. Despite this jumpstart, he began to move robotically rather than snapping back to his normal form of insanity. Having sat down between Haruhi and Kasanoda-kun he then shut down again. Haruhi promptly moved him to the other side of the couch and handed him a supermarket freebie to entertain him. He was then quite content to sit quietly and solve the puzzle.
'That idiot.' Raged the twins as Hikaru reached for his phone.
'Come on sir! How long are you going to escape from reality? I'm warning you sir, while you're being a robot, the situation is rapidly becoming more serious! Listen to me, and think hard about this! If you let things go on like this and let Bossa Nova-chi snatch Haruhi away, then Haruhi's future will be as a godfather's wife!'
That seemed to do the trick. Tamaki-senpai rose unsteadily to his feet then threw his arms up in the air. 'Daddy is against this!'
'Senpai?' Questioned a bewildered Haruhi.
'Bossa Nova-kun! What do you think you are doing here!? Now that you have finally established a bond with your men what good does it do not to strengthen it now?'
'Attaway Sir!' Cheered Hikaru.
Kaoru joined in. 'Go! Go!'
'What about kick the can? Go on! Go right now! Shouldn't you be enjoying your youth to your heart's content? However, after all of this if you tell me you still want to be around Haruhi...then as her daddy, you will have to go through me first!' I face palmed hard, the twins following suit.
Kasanoda-kun stared blankly at Tamaki-senpai. 'Daddy? You mean you're her father? You are Fujioka's father, as young as you are?'
Tamaki-senpai faltered. 'Well maybe we aren't related by blood but...'
'Then, you have some sort of relationship with Fujioka's mother?'
'...no...I don't. I've never even met her.'
'Then you aren't really her father are you?'
Under the furious gaze of the younger student, Tamaki-senpai fled, Honey-senpai rushing to his aid. 'Wah! Tama-chan! Keep it together!'
Tamaki-senpai seemed to have finally gone right over the edge. 'He's right...strictly speaking I am not Haruhi's Daddy.'
'Not loosely speaking either!' Exclaimed the twins. Tamaki-senpai then fainted.

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