summer lovin ::: trixya

:: 7 ::

Chapter seven;
In my feels?

As soon as we got back to the beach house I hurried up the steps and to my room. I flopped down on my bed with a heavy sigh. Why did I have to mess up so big today? It’s obvious that Blair was more than upset with me, she’s never been too good with hiding things. I roll onto my back and stare up at the bare ceiling above me. My breathing slows to a steady pace and I lean up, and bring my knees to my chest.

I look around my room, adores mom did do a good job decorating. My eyes drift off to the corner of my room, right where my guitar sits. I bite my lip and get up. I walk over and softly lay my hand on it. I haven’t dared to touch it since my mom left, she used to always play this guitar infront of me, she’d sing this tune to me (even when I hit my teen years) and I remember it immediately calming me. But of course like everyone else, she left me.

I remove my hand just in time for a soft knock to chime at my door. “Yes?” I call out, a small sigh escaping. “Its me,” Adore answers. “Mind if I come in?” I shrug then remember she can’t see me, so I walk over and open the door. “Hey..” she mumbles awkwardly, I step aside to let her in. “Hey.” Adore looks around my new furnished room with a sad smile. “Mom sure did a good job decorating..” she mutters barely touching my dresser. I nod. “Yep.”

“Soooo.. you okay?” She asks in a concerned way. I shrug and walk over to my bed, we both sit down. “I’m really not the one you should be saying that to..” I scoff.

Adore cringes back abit. “Pearl will talk to Blair, so will Bri.” I nod and drift my eyes back to the guitar. “Why is it that you brought it? It doesn’t really serve any purpose other than making me go back and remember memories I don’t want to remember.” Adore frowns, “I told you, you might get the sudden urge to-“ “to touch the same guitar that was held by the once person I thought would stick by me but didnt?” I snap. Adore quiets. Looks like I did it again. Hurt another friends feelings.

“I’m sorry. It’s just hard to have something like that, that belonged to someone like her.” I sigh and adore just scoots closer and cups my hands. “It’s ok, but can I ask you something?”- I shrug. “Do you ever like, hate her for it?” I look down and think. I don’t think I hate her persay but I do have and hold a grudge against her. “Not really no. I understand why she did it, she wanted to get away from the man that cheated on her, abused her. I’m not mad that she chose to leave a bad situation. I’m just upset she chose to do it with my brother..and she didn’t choose me..don’t get me wrong! I love it here, and I love you and your family, but is this really what my life is now? I’m a seventeen year old whose mother left her and she lives with her best friend.” Adore nodded slightly. “I can’t really say that i understand because obviously I don’t. But you know I’m not going to leave, my family won’t leave, Pearl, Brianna, hell even Blair wouldn’t leave you. Remember in third grade when we all made plans to move in together?-“ I laugh.

“Yeah like that’s actually going to happen.”

Adore stares at me. “Never say never. But that’s not what I’m trying to get at. Righ after we did that, we promised to always be there for each other, even when we had fights, we stuck together and we will now. We’re always gonna be there for you, you can’t keep putting yourself down because of every little mistake. Blair’s not gonna stop being friends with you because you looked at a girl, you know that. Stop beating yourself up Trixie.”

I hug her hard. I had no idea adore could be that sweet, but dang did she get me in my feels. “I love you..” I mutter into her shoulder. “I love you too Trix.”