When Autumn Leaves [SungJoy]

-six-

Sungjae's POV

"Is that really you?"

I just stared at them as they walk towards me.

"Peniel. Changsub-hyung." I muttered their name. Why are they here? The university is far from here, it's in the City and it takes hours to get here.

As soon as they got near to me, they hugged me.

"Wha-"

"Shut up man!" Peniel said in english. They let go of him and stared at him. "You changed."

"Yeah..." I was too shocked to see them here.

"You just dropped out all of a sudden, what happened?" Changsub hyung said. "Don't you know that many girls came to us looking for you?"

"Nonsense." It's not like I'm popular.

I eyed Sooyoung who's busy with her phone. She took her bag and gave me a I'm-going-ahead look, I nod. I'll just thank her later.

Peniel said that they are here for a tour and will stay for a night. I told them that I have a work and they decided to have a drink with me later after my out since they also have to go back.

My out is seven, by 6:30, the two were already waiting for me outside. We decided to eat first then have a drink by the river.

Changsub hyung pour me a glass of soju.

"You're a horrible friend do you know that?" he said taking a drink of his glass. "You changed your number. You didn't told us you'll drop out. You even came back here without saying goodbye. You don't know how worried we are."

I can only look down. "Sorry." I muttered.

"Tell us. Why did you drop out?"

I look at them, comtemplating on what to do. These two are my closest friend in the university. Unlike me, they are blessed with a good family who doesn't have a problem financially. However, they are both down to earth and kind.

I took my glass and drink it in one shot then took another. I need some time before I tell them everything.

When my head felt light. I told them from the start. From my father to my sister and my current condition.

I don't know if this is God's way to test me. But I still continue to believe in Him because of my sister, I'm hanging on because of her. The doctors and nurses tending my sister probably thinks that she's not going to wake up anymore but I refuse to believe although my mind says otherwise.

When the heart is in pain, it's only the time you follow what your brain says. Deep down for me, I don't know what to believe anymore.

It's not the struggle of keeping up with the money and bills, but the struggle of going on with life in pain, as if it'll never end.

I only live for my sister since I gave up living for myself already. So I wonder about those what 'ifs'... that what if... I do believe she'll wake up but what if, what if she doesn't wake up?

They became silent when I'm done telling my story.

It was Peniel who broke the silence, "Are you eating properly?"

I gave a smile, nodding slightly.

"What about money?"

"I get by. Don't worry."

"Just tell us if you need help or anything. We'll help you."

I smiled at both of them. I'm glad I got to talk to them today.

"Enough of me, how are you two anyway? Got any girlfriend yet?"

They both rolled their eyes that made me laugh.

Changsub-hyung scratched his head. "Since you were gone, no female came to us anymore."

"When Yeri wake up, are you coming back to school then?"

I nod at them. It's my dream to study again so of course I'm coming back when Yeri wakes up and in a stable condition.

"What about you? Who was the girl earlier? She's pretty." Peniel when he remembered the girl glancing at them.

"Oh Sooyoung? She's just my co-worker, nothing else."

"Really? Then give me her number."

"I don't have her number. I'll ask tomorrow."

"Oh yeah! Thanks buddy."

I just shake my head, smiling. We talked about just everything we can think of, our embarrassing moments, our funny moments and even the times we made fun of our angry instructor, we laughed a lot that night. We reminisced our past that night.

We stayed there for two more hours before calling it a night, since they will be going back tomorrow, we exchanged numbers then I went to the hospital. I sleep there during weekends.

I sat on a chair beside her bed and just in time, Joohyun noona arrived pushing a cart.

She smiled when she saw me. "Hi. You're late today."

I ruffled my hair. We drank a bit too much earlier so I still feel light headed.

"You were drinking." Joohyun noona said in a-matter-of-fact, she must've smelled the alcohol on my clothes. "This is a first. You improved."

"What?"

Joohyun noona laughed. "You were just work, home, hospital then repeat. It's not bad to do something different."

I gave up. "Friends from City came by. We just catched up with each other."

"I see." After checking Yeri, she said goodbye and went out.

I put my arms on her bed then plopped down to sleep. For the first time, I felt like a human again. Laughing, frustrated and now crying.

My arms is now wet from my tears but it's strange.

I'm smiling.