Forbidden Fruit

Epilogue

The cheers of the crowd send chills down my spine. I have played for big crowds before, but never like this. 60 000 people were cheering, half of them against me and my team. After all these years, I was finally here. After all the work and trouble I had to go through, I was finally standing here, with my team, about to enter the Soldier Field of Chicago. I had dreamed about this since my dad had shown me how to throw a football. And now it was finally happening. 

I will never forget the day my passion for football started. I had played with my dad, a lot, but I will never forget how we went to the park one day, me, my dad and my very sick mother at the time. She watched us, as my dad and I threw the ball back and forth, until we started to actually play a bit. And somehow, I had found the strength inside my five year old body, to throw the football with so much force back to my father, that he didn't catch it and actually fell. 

For a moment, I was scared, that he had gotten hurt or was angry at me, but when he stood up and walked over to me, he told me how incredibly proud he was. Because all I had managed to do up until this point was throw the ball from a near distance back at him. I had smiled at him and he at me. The voice of my mother, who was calling me over to where she was sitting, got my attention. I was a good son and so of course I followed her wishes, running over to my mother. She pulled me into a hug and told me, how amazing what I just did was. It was one of her last days not being in the hospital and I hadn't put the football down ever since. 

I always wanted to become a professional football player. I watched all the games, trained harder than every other kid and gave it my best. When I joined my first kids football team, they didn't count the points, so nobody would lose and just have fun. Oh but I counted. And I won every time. And if I didn't, my dad took me for some ice cream and told me that it was ok. He knew how much it meant to me and he never stood in my way of getting where I wanted to go. Of course, he as a single father and sherif, had a lot to do and was busy all the time. So I spend a lot of time at Nicks house, but I never felt left behind. Because even though my father wasn't that much there for me considering the time, he was very much there for me emotionally and mentally. 

I think he too got excited about me becoming a pro athlete and when I once told him about my concerns of not making it in this business because I was gay, he told me he would put everybody behind bars, who would consider that as a problem. If you fight hard you can win and he was right. Because I got a football scholarship and didn't have to be silent about my sexuality. It also wouldn't have been worth it, because as much as I love football, I love myself enough to not hide. And when I got together with Nick, I especially didn't want to hide anymore. 

After college, it got a bit more difficult. Because after my last game, I had a lot of offers from football teams, who wanted to sign me. I decided for one, but when they found out I was gay, they withdrew their offer. My dad was furious and so was Nick. But it didn't matter, because an even better team offered me to sign with them, even though they knew I about my sexuality. They didn't care and told me, that the public opinion needed to change and with them signing an openly homosexual, maybe they could help with that. 

So I signed with them and now, it was my first big game. I mean, we had a couple of locals and just a lot of training, but now, it was the first big game of the season and my nerves were completely wrecked. I was always excited and nervous before a big game, but this...this was a new kind of nervous. Yesterday, Nick had to calm me down, like a lot, so I wouldn't have a heart attack. I don't know why I was so nervous, but I guess 60 000 people could do that to you. No, actually, those weren't really the problem. I didn't care how many pairs of eyes were watching me I guess, I just wanted to make my team proud and not regret choosing me. 

"You alright mate?" James, one of my teammates asked me. We would be running out of the tunnel together and I had actually bonded with him quite a bit. He was originally from London, but nobody wanted to sign with him there, because he was a bit older than most boys fresh out of college. He was only 10 years older than me and just as new to all of this. But he was an amazing player and I often trained with him, because he was so good. I nodded, not really convincing him as he raised an eyebrow.