Moving on (sequel to I never told you)

Is this the end?

Harry's POV

Just like all holidays ours unfortunately came to end too quickly for our liking. I boarded the plane with a heavy heart but a camera roll filled with the greatest memories. This had been not only my first holiday with my little girl but my first proper holiday with my boyfriend and it was one to cherish. It had been so lovely to spend the whole week with Taylor as well, it felt like we really reconnected; I hadn't felt this close to her since we dated. It made me look forward to us seeing each other on our tour.
Everyone but me fell asleep on the journey home, I couldn't get my brain to stop stressing over the next chapter in my life. A few months ago I had been certain that going solo with my career was what I wanted, but now I wasn't sure if I was ready to leave my family for so long; not especially when Louis and I might had discovered we want a baby.
I knew I was being absurd and Louis definitely wouldn't let me give up my career just as the next exciting part was just around the corner. I didn't want to give up on the dream either but I also wanted to have a family that Louis could really feel apart off. This holiday had made me realise that.

We finally landed back in London at 1am, Matilda stayed asleep as Louis carried her off the plane. The airport was quiet and I saw on the noticeboard that there were no flights due to leave until 6am.
"The car should be up front" Taylor mumbled as we collected our luggage from baggage claim. We nodded and followed her through the airport. The car was sat waiting for us and we climbed in quickly to get out of the chilly air.
45 minutes later and we were home, I felt my shoulders relax and I was greatful that I would soon be in bed. I climbed out the car helping Louis out who still held a sleeping Matilda. Taylor climbed out with us and helped me grab the suitcases while Louis took Matilda to her bed.
"Why don't you stay tonight?" I said to Taylor feeling guilty that she still had another half hour drive back to her house. She shook her head all most at once in protest.
"I can't intrude like that" was all she said before I grabbed her hand and thanked her driver for the ride and lead us both inside the house. She didn't disagree as I lead us into the front room.
"Louis won't like this" Taylor sighed, I furrowed my eyebrows. Why did she care what Louis thought?
"What makes you say that?" I ask sitting on the sofa and pulling her next to me. Even though it was late and I wanted to get to bed, I wanted to be there for Taylor; to comfort any problems she was having. Taylor looked at the floor as if she was embarrassed to even be having this conversation with me, I knew it would be difficult talking about Louis to me.
"You can tell me anything" I say gently placing my hand on her thigh and turning her face to look at me. Her eyes glistened in the soft light in the living room and her lips parted and a little gasp of air left her lips at the surprise of my touch on her skin. She was beautiful, she always had been. We stared at each other, I felt like there was this force bringing me closer to her. Before I could stop myself I kissed her.

Louis' POV
I froze, I couldn't move. I wanted to stop them, my heart pleaded with me to stop them. But I couldn't move, I felt like this was stuck; unable to speak. I felt my heart shatter again, how many times was I going to let this guy break my heart? After everything we had been through Harry was lucky I was still with him. And now I see this, I'm at breaking point. I obviously didn't mean anything to Harry anymore, deep down I knew it all along; I was just kidding myself into thinking I could be his.
I had hoped that maybe it would be a quick kiss but I was wrong, they seemed very into the moment neither of them pulling away. I felt sick, my whole relationship was a lie, I wasn't in love with a guy like me; I was in love with a straight guy. And we all knew how it was going to end. Heartbreak. And this was mine.
I stood for 10 minutes watching them make out on our sofa, I felt like an outsider looking in on someone's heartbreak story. Harry had completely destroyed me 5 years ago and I thought we had got over that, I truly believed he was over Taylor. But how can he be when they have a child, they have a connection. Two things that Harry and I clearly didn't have. I was never going to be his first choice, I was always going to come last; yet he always came first. I just couldn't believe I was getting burnt by the same flame again, how stupid can one person get?
As they pulled away from each other Harry smiled at her, a smile that held love and lust. I could only see the back of Taylor's head but I assumed she returned it. Why was she even here? Why hadn't she gone home? I couldn't bare to watch anymore, I think I was officially done. My heart had been broken and fixed by the same person too many times and yet I still found a way to love him like he had never broke it. I had never broken Harry's heart and I knew if I played the shit he played,  I would've been kicked to the curb years ago.
Part of me wanted to leave and never come back, and the other part of me wanted to stay and forget about tonight. Maybe that's why Harry did this to me as he knew I couldn't leave. Just as I was going to turn and walk back up stairs I had to sudden urge to confront them both. I walked into the living room, my hands shaking and anger rushing through me.
"Sorry to break up this little make out session." I spit, Harry and Taylor looked at me confused.
"What are you on about?" Harry laughed standing up and coming towards me. Was he being serious? Was he seriously going to pretend nothing had happened?
"Don't play stupid Harry" I yell, I had, had enough of these games now. Harry's face dropped, he ran his hands over his face and looked at me with sad eyes.
"Lou.." he began but quickly stopped when I shook my head, the tears beginning to flow down my cheeks.
"How could you do this again!? After everything that happened 5 years ago! All the hurt and pain I went through! You hurt me a lot back then and I forgave you! I still stayed with you! But what for Harry? What the fuck for? So you can pretend to be someone your not!? So you can make a mug of me? I fucking love you! Yet you don't give a shit about me! Never did and never will!" I practically full on screaming the words now, all the pain and anger coming out. Harry doesn't say anything he just stands there watching me have my break down.
"I can't do this anymore Harry. If you want to be with Taylor then that's fine. I hope you're happy together. But I'm done, I'm gone." I begin to walk away when Harry grabs me.
"Wait-" he pleads pulling me towards him. I sigh in frustration, as much as I wanted to stay I knew it would best to leave him. I looked at Harry his eyes starting to well up. Did he really think I was going to fall for crocodile tears?
"Yes, I did kiss her. I don't know why I did it. I guess it was just a in the moment thing. It meant nothing though. I love you. I need you Louis. I don't know what I would do without you. You're my soulmate. Please don't leave me. I know I have messed up so many times, I know I have hurt you so many times. I know I don't deserve you, I know there are better people out there for you. But despite everything I have done. I do love you. I may not show it and I know tonight certainly didn't show it. But I do, so fucking much. I'm begging please don't leave me. Please forgive me!" He's sobbing by the time he finishes his speech. I almost want to kiss him and tell him that everything will be okay. But I can't, I'm hurt and I hate him for doing this to me; again.
I shake my head pulling out of his grip. Taylor watches us, I look at her shaking my head.
" you get your own way." I spit at her. She looks at me shocked.
"Louis I don't want it break you to up!" She sighs. I laugh at her words.
"Maybe you should leave" Harry says to her, she nods and heads towards the front door. She looks back at us. "I'm sorry" she mutters and then leaves.
"Lou, please. You do believe I love you?" Harry asks desperation in his voice. I used to believe he did.
"I don't know what to believe Harry. I would like to think you love me the way I love you. But your actions speak very clear to me." I mumble. Harry's face drops.
"I do love you, it's always been you." Harry defends. I wish I could believe his words but I don't feel the love.
"No Harry it's always been Taylor. Are you even gay? Or is this just some sort of trend for you?" My words are bitter but I don't care.
"No Louis I am actually gay. Taylor was just an experiment to see if I was gay, and things just went too far. I'm scared to loose you Louis. I don't think I can live without you. I'll limit my contact with Taylor, I'll only talk to her with regards to Matilda. I'll do anything to prove it's you and only you I want." His words hold some sincerity to them, and I want to believe him I really do.
"Harry you've hurt me so many times. I can't keep going through this." I cry, Harry looks hurt at my words.
"So this is the end then?" Harry chokes, I can't bring myself to look at him. I love him, I want to stay but I can't.
"Isn't this for the best?" I question, he shakes his head so fast it could fall off.
"No! It's not! The best is for us to work this out!" Harry pleads.
"Isn't that what we've always done? And look how it turned out. Me hurt again!" I shout.
"So you're actually going to leave?" Fear is laced in his words.
"This isn't over Harry but I need my time and space. I'm angry I don't want to make a rash decision but something needs to change".
Harry nods I can see he is relieved I'm staying but he goes on tour soon. Maybe that's the departure I need.
"I'll sleep in the office tonight" is all I say as I walk away from him. I'm staying for now. But my heart has had enough, it seems impossible to fix this time.
I think I had finally reached the end.