Avowal // pjm [COMPLETED]

Decisions

Jimin POV

"Why did you stop? Something is wrong, isn't it?" Quae asks when I roll off of her and onto my back. I hesitate to voice my concern.

We've never stayed missionary the whole time and we definitely never had sex for as long as we just did. I came deep inside her but it wasn't like any other time I had before. Something changed.

Quae pulls the blanket over her breasts and holds it there as she leans on one elbow to see my face. "Ji. Talk to me."

Things are different now. I'm feeling new things and I don't know how to process them. Running my fingers through my hair I turn to look at her.

"You felt different. You've never felt the way you just did. You opened yourself up fully to me and I could feel it. I felt every part of you for the first time."

"Is that a bad thing? I would've thought it would make you happy."

I slide my hand up between her breasts. "I felt you here, Quae. I felt your heart. I could feel your heart and you're scared."

She smiles brushing a single hair from my face. "I love you, Jimin Park. Just you and only you. I made a decision for the both of us recently that could forever alter our relationship."

I frown asking "Why wouldn't you talk to me about a decision that affects us both?"

Quae leans in and kisses me lovingly. "Because you would have tried to talk me out of it."

I feel panicked. Attempting to prepare myself for bad news, I close my eyes. "What is it?"

Quae moves and I open my eyes as she straddles me, our intimate areas touching each other. She's still so warm and wet pressed directly onto my length I feel my body react.

She leans down to me kissing my neck and nibbling my earlobe while she rotates her hips. She's instigating. She moans softly in my ear and I squeeze her thighs.

"Quae, I'm going to get hard again. What is the decision you made?"

She reaches between us stroking my length until I am fully erected. She runs the head in her folds before she sinks down on me and raises herself to sitting.

Quae feels amazing. She bounces and rolls her hips taking me to the hilt. She moans throwing her head back at the feeling and I release some sounds of my own.

This doesn't feel like any other time we've had sex either. She rides me with a purpose, her walls begging for my release. They squeeze and hold me needing all of me.

This is how I've always wanted to make love to Quae, completely open, but now that I am I'm not sure how I feel. I want to enjoy every second but the fact that she hasn't told me of her decision worries me.

It's as if Quae's body takes note of my resistance and she works harder to get me to my peak. She whimpers pounding herself onto me before I can't hold back any longer and sit up wrapping my arms around her body, groaning as I release into her with my face buried into her chest.

My body shivers from aftershocks and Quae strokes my hair. She leans down kissing the top of my head before she says, "I took my last birth control pill a month ago. I never refilled the prescription."

I lift my head to look in Quae's eyes. "What are you saying?"

"I'm saying I'm not on birth control anymore." She kisses my forehead.

"Don't do this because of me. Please."

"It's already happened. I knew you would try to talk me out of it so I never brought it up. And I want to. My therapist and I spent several sessions discussing the possibilities of getting off of my birth control. It helped that she lost a child as well so she knew what I was going through. She made me realize that deep down I honestly wanted a child."

"Quae, this is a huge decision. How could you not talk to me about it? I'm your husband!"

She moves to the bed beside me pulling the blanket over herself. Reaching down to the floor, she grabs the sleeveless shirt she had earlier and tugs it over her head.

Quae keeps her back to me as she stands. "Have you changed your mind about wanting a child with me now that it could actually happen?"

I move to her turning her around by her hips. "Of course I haven't! I just don't understand why you wouldn't talk to me first.. unless.."

"It was meant to be a happy surprise for our anniversary only you don't seem happy."

"I am beyond happy that you really want to do this. I really am. I just didn't want you to make this decision because it is what I want. Decisions in this partnership should be made by the both of us, not just one." I bring her hands to my lips and kiss them both.

"I want a child with you, Ji, and I'm honestly ready. I suppose it's kinda too late to change my mind anyway." Quae chuckles weakly.

"It doesn't always happen the first time." I state, slipping my hands under her shirt and caressing her skin as I kiss her softly just behind her ear.

Quae exhales and whimpers at my touch. Her hands trace the lines of my biceps up to my neck before diving into my hair. She moans when I suck in on her flesh.

"How long are you willing to try?" I purr.

Quae mewls, a new sound I've never heard from her, gently tugging at the roots of my hair. "At least one more time tonight."