WICKED GAMES WITH THE MAFIA

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The tears streamed down my face as I shook my head. My heart was aching, how could he be so cruel? My heart was breaking, my whole body quivering as he held me.

"Don't do this to me." I said, the words leaving me so torn, the pain striking like a bolt of lightning the pain and hurt having me gasp as I stared at him trying to see how a person could do such a thing.

How could a person do this to another?

"Seith, I don't know what I have done to you but please just don't do this to me, I can't take it."

I looked up at him wanting to see the man who was just playing with my life as if I was nothing, hurting me in the most hurtful ways over and over again. I don't know what I had done to deserve such. Don't know who I wronged in this world to be hurt in such a way. Have I not suffered enough?

"I know, I know I betrayed you- but just please I can't do this, I can't take this!" I screamed in his face watching as he watched me, his face blurry more and more tears pouring out it seeming as if someone just punched a hole in my chest pulling my heart out.

Why didn't he just kill me? Why didn't he just get it over with because this is so much worse than death?  At this point I didn't care, he could kill me and that would better than this. More sobs wrecked my body, my world crushing down, the pain too much as it felt as if the air was being sucked away leaving me gasping and heaving, the room spinning and the panic setting in. My eyes were wide open, my hands on my chest clenching it so tight the memories rushing in, my body convulsing harder and harder.

"Your family was involved in a car accident-"

"What? When? What happened? Are they okay? No please no, are they okay?"

"Please sit back down miss and let me finish." The lady had said, sitting down herself at the other end of the table looking pissed off yet for some reason she calmed herself down as I sat down cursing myself for cutting her off. It was not like these police officers were known for their kindness, lord knows I avoided going to any government offices like the plaque.

She had gave me a warning look before clearing her voice.

"Your parents and younger brother were involved in an accident down at Malagwane hill going under an oil transporting truck, both the car and truck combusting."

I had sat there, the words ringing in my ears having listened but not have heard anything, my eyes had already been shimmering with tears, confusion having me shake my head yet my heart had already been broken as if my body had known before my mind could sort through all the words. Trying to read her expression but she gave no clue as she stared at me, her lips moving yet the words not seeming to get to me as the room span, the graduation cap in my hand slipping to the floor, my chest tightening as I clenched my chest, my body swaying off the chair with the tears just pooling out and my body shaking so bad as if it would bust.

It felt as if the bandage had just been ripped, the pain so raw I felt like I was dying , crushing- my whole body crushing as I cried my heart out, the words ringing in my head over and over again as if the officer had just said them out loud. All I had to bury were bones after so many fights that had left me alone with the whole extended family washing their hands on me, their greed getting the best of them leaving me with nothing as they came full force claiming everything away while I grieved.

My whole body was buried in his chest as I bawled, the only family I had ripped away from me so painfully leaving me all alone to face this cruel world alone, how cruel it had been and I had had enough. If he was going to torment me in such a way then he would rather kill me for I had had enough. I could not take it anymore.

"Just kill me." The words spilled out of my lips pulling away from his embrace, pushing him hard.

How could he?

"I will never do such." His hands quickly went grabbing my face, the tears just streaming down, a waterfall of salty water.

"I am not playing games. Look at me Melissa. Look at me!"

My eyes trailed all around but him. I did not want to see his lying face, did not want to see the smirk on his face probably happy with himself.

"Look at me please." His voice was desperate and pleading if I was not mistaken making me snap my teary eyes to him barely seeing him through the tears clouding my vision trying so hard not to fall apart but how could I not? How could I not when this man that I seemed to have fallen in love with just took the one thing I had left crushing it into a million pieces? How could I when he tortured me with the only thing he knew I dreamed about and wanted for so long? How could he dare use that against me?

"I love you Melissa, I love you with all my being and I will rather spend the rest of my life trying to show you how much I love you."

I shook my head, more tears spilling out. He was lying. He was lying!

"Yes baby, I do."

I shook my head, wanting to get away from him, wanting to just run out and never look back not being able to take this.

"You have a home in me, you are my home and I will forever protect and love you till I take my last breath. This I promise."

"Please don't do this."

"I could have chosen any woman Mel but I did not want anyone besides you. I know you have been suffering, know you have been alone fighting the world all by yourself but you don't have to anymore because fuck Mel I will fight for you night and day. I will go to hell and back for you. I don't want to see you cry, don't want to see you hurt and if I could I would take all the pain because somehow you have become one of the most important people in my life. You are my family and fuck I love you."

His forehead lay on mine, more tears streaming out, my heart drumming in my chest with his hands holding the sides of my face. My eyes never left his before his lips claimed mine so passionately, it seeming as if his words were not getting through, holding me tight and kissing me as if his life depended on it, kissing me as if the world was ending and he would rather die with me in his arms. My lips moved along, taking him in so desperately wanting to feel him closer and closer, a sob leaving me shaking so bad in his arms with his words sending more hot tears spilling down my eyes as I grabbed on him like life itself.  His lips tore from mine, pulling me into a hug with my head buried in the crook of his neck, crying my heart out.

He loved me.

He cared.

He was home.

I have a home.