Sweet Caroline

#32 The truth comes out

"So, Elise," I press, wanting Nathan to get on with the story.

"Right," he grunts. "Elise. I moved in with her and proposed shortly after. We got married and she wanted to have kids right away, so we tried. And tried. And tried. Nothing happened, so we went to the doctor, got tested and it turned out that while I was perfectly virile, Elise had a hostile uterus. So hostile, in fact, that we tried IVF because we didn't seem to be able to get her pregnant the natural way, even with her treatments."

It was obvious he didn't want to get into that and I understood that. It must have been hard on Elise as well as him and I had a feeling he was still trying to protect her privacy somewhat, even though he was spilling a lot of her personal life to me.

"So Rose was conceived through IVF?" I ask, trying to get him out of his pensive state.

"No, actually, she was conceived when we got stupidly drunk after our one millionth fight. We were so stressed all the time and I had even tried talking her into waiting for a year or so before trying again, because the stress was making her a royal bitch and me an asshole." He shakes his head. "It's been a long time since I talked about that time of my life. We both weren't the best version of ourselves and I'd already started to wonder if we were even meant to be together at that point. I always thought that when you really love someone, you will support each other through dark times. I still think that, actually. I mean, sure, couples will always hit rough patches from time to time, but we were just so angry all the time. Our relationship was all about getting a kid and we didn't even have much love for each other anymore."

"But then she got pregnant and you stayed?" I get that. Of course he wasn't going to leave her when she got pregnant.

"Exactly," he agrees. "And that was stupid. Well, not that I stayed, I mean, what was I going to do? I wanted a kid and she was having mine, so I wasn't going anywhere. Looking back, I should have left her before she got pregnant. Then again, I wouldn't have Rose, so I guess it's a good thing I stayed."

It's so lovely to see the way his face lights up when he says Rose's name. He loves that little girl so much. And he should. She's lovely.

"And then, during her pregnancy, Elise cheated on me."

"What?!" I exclaim. "During her pregnancy?"

"Found her in our bed with her yoga-instructor." He laughs at my shocked expression. "Yeah, I was surprised too, to say the least. She said it was all the pregnancy hormones. I definitely should have left then, but she was carrying my baby, so I stayed."

"Holy fuck," I curse. "That's messed up."

"Oh, we haven't even gotten to the really good part yet," Nathan warns me. "Let's fast-forward a bit. I sort of forgave her for cheating, Rose came into the world and I fell utterly in love with that little girl. Elise's mother eased up on me once she realized I wasn't the awful father she thought I'd be-"

"You're an amazing father," I cut in.

His face falls. "I'm not feeling all that amazing these days."

We both grow silent when we remember everything that has happened. Poor Rose. Goddamn fucking asshole Trevor. I pull Nathan to me and stroke his hair.

"That's not your fault, Nate. You handled it in the best way possible once you found out."

He shakes his head. "No, you did. You found out and you handled it."

"Nathan, all I did was find a drawing and hand it over to you. You took care of Rose. And you didn't even race over to his house to kill him like you would have done back when you were 18."