Green with envy | Wicked | Book 1/3

Nessa

I sit stubbornly whilst Elphaba fastens my braces back onto my legs, she finishes and sits down beside me.
She Leans her back gently on one of my wheels.
I put my hand down onto her shoulder, Elphie takes hold of it.

Then my door flys open.
"Nessarose, what have I said about having guests over?" Madame Morrible cries out angrily, "Elphaba? Where were you, you missed spell class"
Elphaba looks feistily at Madame Morrible,
"I won't miss it again, I had to help my sister" she says protectively.
Madame Morrible walks over to my other side and crouches down,
"And what may I ask did your sister need to help you with, nessarose?"
I look down shamefully, Elphaba jumps in to save me.
"She forgot to put on her leg braces, so I had to do it for her"
Madame Morrible nods slowly,
"Yes, your father gave strict instructions that the braces must stay on." She says pointing at me angrily.
I look down at Elphie.
"Even though I don't need them" I mutter quietly, Elphaba scowls at me.

"Well quiet frankly I'm quiet disappointed in you miss Nessarose, if it's for your own health benefit then I'd expect you to remember, I'll have words with my assistant" Madame Morrible says dryly, "but Elphaba the way you show to care for your sister is very amicable, I'll be going now."
Madame Morrible leaves, Elphie looks at me.
I can't tell if she's sad or angry.
"I'm sorry for taking you away from your friends like that I just..."
"They're not my friends" I say cutting her off "they just wanted to brag about their dates to the dance and I didn't want to be alone."
Elphie gets up from beside me and pulls an arm chair away from the side of my bed and puts it in front of me, she sits down.
"Ness, If there was a way for me to meet the wizard but it meant that I couldn't be around for a while, would you mind?"
I take in what she's saying, I act like I hadn't heard it before.
I don't need her but it would feel strange without her being there.
"Or I could try and take you with me, or..."
"Don't be silly Elphie, it's your life, your opportunity, go! don't worry about me" I say exitedly.
Elphie looks so happy, I don't have the heart to tell her that I'll miss her terribly.
"Elphie I got a response from father today"
Elphaba nods at me,
"He said that Madame Morrible had already told him that you were going to see the wizard, he's making me go back home when you go" I say, suddenly having to hold back tears.
Elphie grabs my hands,
"Nessa I'm so sorry,"
I shake my head,
"Stop it, don't make me cry, I'm not about to start crying now" I say moodily,
Elphie looks so guilt stricken,
"No, don't feel bad, your going to do amazing things I know you will!" I say excitedly, "and I'm going to enjoy being back with father he can take care of me better than any of Madame Morribles assistants"
Elphaba leans in closer,
"I don't understand, I thought you liked more independence,"
"I do, I really do I just miss being back home"
I miss being the favourite.
"What about that munchkin boy, Boc?" Elphie asks,
"Well I'll still see him, how could I not, he's so wonderful" I say exitedly "we optionally graduate in two years he can come and live with me then"
Elphie looks unamused but she smiles anyway.
"Well it sounds like you have everything worked out" she says sounding relived.

I'm looking forward to having Boc stay with me,
Oh Boc, the kindest person I've ever met who's actually shown genuine interest in me.
"Elphie, your going to make father so proud!" I exclaim, Elphabas face brightens up, "I wonder what he wants to see your for!"
Elphie ponders,
"I put in concerns for the animals of Oz, perhaps he will do something about it!"
Elphie says determinedly.
I smile at her and push myself over to the mirror, I stare down at my leg braces.
"Nessa stop it" Elphie says catching on with what I'm doing.
"I'm not doing anything" I lie,
Elphaba stands up and turns my chair round to face the other wall.
"Nessa your beautiful and your braces don't change that"
I sigh, I'm just not as pretty as the other girls.

Elphaba goes and sits on my bed and I turn myself back around to look in the mirror, Elphie and father always say that I look like my mother.
I can't see it when I look at pictures of her, she was so beautiful.
I always end up asking Elphie questions about her, I know it makes her sad.
"Elphie, was mother exited to have me"
Elphie sits up, she has a sad look in her eyes.
"Of course, she always spoke about how beautiful you were going to be and how much she already loved you" Elphie says.
I start to cry, she loved me and I Killed her.
I know I did, I've always known it.
I can't be a coincidence that I came out like this and mother never woke up.
Suddenly I'm being hugged by Elphie.
"Don't cry Nessa your making me feel guilty about going to the wizard!" She laughs, but she's crying too.
"Elphie, you need to go and pack," I say trying to clear the air.
Elphie nods and leans off of me onto the floor, still holding my arms.
"Once you've gone, I'm going to find Boc"
I have to see him one more time before I leave.

Elphie stands up and makes her way to the door,
"Those shoes really suit you" she says quickly, then leaves.
I look at them in the mirror.
The ones that father gave me, beautiful, shiny and red.
I place my hand as far down on my leg as I can without bending over and potentially falling out of my chair.
I do something that I haven't done in a long while, I pinch my leg.
Nothing.
I can never feel anything, I don't know what I expected, as if not doing it for a few years might change the outcome.
I let go, there's a large red mark on my leg, Boc won't find it pretty.
No one would find that pretty.