Item Description: A visual cognitohazard affecting approximately 20% of sapient viewers. Object compels the viewer to seek and consume the nearest unopened slice of American cheese.
Date of Recovery: 03-18-2013
Location of Recovery: Sydney, Austrailia
Current Status: In storage. Cheese kept on-site in the event of accidental exposure.
Item Description: A 335 ml glass cup that causes waitstaff of any location to compulsively fill it to the brim.
Date of Recovery:3-29-2016
location of Recovery: █████████ ████, Atlanta, Georgia
Current Status: Broken after staff in kitchen raced to fill it up.
Notes: Remnants reformed into bowl on orders of Dr. ███████, effects remain.
Descriptive: Penny-sized, green, circular. Anomalously causes immediate dying if non-descriptives or non-actives are used in describing.
Recovered: ██-██-20██
Currently: Held securely. Termination requested.
Item Description: A ███████ brand Go-Kart that leaves footprints instead of tire tracks. Radio will only play the sound of an unidentified male weeping.
Date of Recovery: 09-03-2013
Location of Recovery: A recently abandoned warehouse in ████████, England
Current Status: Held in Site-██'s low-value vehicle garage.
Item Description: A metronome. When turned on by an individual, said individual will sway to the pendulum until it stops. Individuals who do so are unable to recall swaying to the metronome.
Date of Recovery: 09-29-1985
Location of Recovery: Venice, Italy
Current Status: In high value storage of Site-██
Item Description: The skeleton of an unknown species of the clade Dinosauria that dates back 160 million years. The specimen appears to be bipedal, with two large 3 meter feet on the end of 27 centimeter legs, and a seemingly randomly curved spine. The subject's front limbs have been replaced with apparatuses that function similarly to M1911 handguns, entirely constructed from bone. The limbs only shoot shards of bone in the shape of 9mm handgun bullets, and will not shoot if supplied with any other type of bullet.
Date of Recovery: 9-5-2008
Location of Recovery: An undisclosed dig site in Kansas, USA.
Current Status: In storage at Site-551's Archaeological Wing.
Item Description: A self-refilling 3.8 liter "gallon jug" of milk, which if ingested causes the subject to vomit cheese after a period of 3 to 6 hours.
Date of Recovery: 4/30/1986
Location of Recovery: ████████ County Fair, Alabama, USA
Current Status: In refrigerated storage at Site-██
Item Description: An unknown brand chemical toilet (colloquially known as a "Porta-potty"). Analysis of the materials used to construct the item reveals that the structure is approximately 165 million years old. Multiple instances of petrified feces belonging to unknown species of the clade Dinosauria are found within the item's holding tank.
Date of Recovery: 03-28-2017
Location of Recovery: An undisclosed city in Montana, USA.
Current Status: In storage.
Item Description: A bearded dragon that produces a miniature representation of the Aurora Borealis.
Date of Recovery: ██-██-2002
Location of Recovery: ████ ███████, Colorado
Current Status: In animal containment.
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Log Of Anomalous Items
Non-FictionThe SCP Foundation has discovered a substantial number of items which are simply too useless to merit further attention. This document lists those items which have prompted some curiosity. It may be used as a resource should knowledge of these items...
