Ill rise up

Part 11

Blaire's POV

I have been a wake for a while laying here thinking about last night, I cannot believe I let that all out, they must think I am the biggest freak in the world. But they are right I need to let them in I can't keep doing this on my own it isn't working, what if I put the adoption in jeopardy, I cant let that happen. I carefully run my hand through Blazes fur softly as he moves to lay on my tummy. I hear the door to Parkers and Demis room open, I assume demi stayed she always does. I quickly get out of bed forgetting the crutches wanting to catch who it is. I open the door and see Parker about to walk down the stairs but he turns to me gauging my mood before he gives me a lopsided smile and walks to me when he gets o me I hug him tightly which he returns. After a few moments he releases me from the hug.

"wwhere are you going" I stutter out almost fearful he is sick of all this that I am too much work.

"I was going to go for a run but how about you and I head outside for a bit" he suggest and I nod to go grab my crutches.

"leave them squirt I'll give you a piggyback ride, we will do some physio soon as well." He says I nod and climb up on his back smiling a little.

We are sitting on the grass it is a little wet from the overnight cold. I know he wants to say something but again it is like he fears my reaction. I watch as Dexter runs clumsily around the yard and Blaze stays close as if he knows I will need him.

"squirt I don't want you to feel like we are bombarding you but please take this into consideration because it will help us both so much, I want us to start counselling, separately and together squirt, I know I have issues from the war and loosing Cooper, in full honesty I even had a full blown panic attack yesterday at the thought of losing you, I thought you and Demi had died like cooper and I couldn't stop it, I need to deal with these demons and I know you need someone to talk to and help guide you through all the stuff you went through I'm always here to listen squirt but I don't know how to help properly. I want to do sessions together, to learn how to communicate, learn how to help each other. this could really help our case as well squirt showing that we are really trying. I have booked us in for a family one tomorrow morning and I have some high recommendations for someone I want to book you in with squirt I just wanted to make sure you would talk to someone, I have the army finding someone for me to talk to as I think I need someone who understands war PTSD" Parker explains I take some time to consider what he has said I feel a range of emotions anger, fear, sadness that Parker had a panic attack because I ran off, and realisation that he is right, I pluck the grass out a little harder and I sigh.

"yea I know your right I guess I am bloody fucked up huh last night was an indicated of that. As long as it helps the case as well I'll do it." I say I see him cringe out the side of my view what I say I am fucked up.

"hey, your not fucked up squirt, just a little broken like the rest of us and just need some help to put the pieces back in place. Do you think myself or Demi are fucked up because we have some mental health issues as well" he ask and I shake my head no I don't think they are fucked up they are strong?

"no, I think you are both strong" I say and he smiles a knowing smile at me before pulling me in for a side hug kissing the top of my head

"you're my favourite human Squirt" he says making me smile up at him

"you my favourite person to stretch" I reply making him smile.

"and here I thought I'd be one of your favourites" I head Demi joke form behind making me smile but it is obvious she startled myself and Parker. She sits the opposite side of me and I give her a hug, my way of apologising she kisses my head and I smile.