Ill rise up

Part 13

"... Blaire Well we all need to go see the judge before you leave and he will let you know his discission." He says and I want to cry again I just want to know; the anxiety is too much for me to handle. It starts to radiate of Parker as well which makes it worst for me.

"Bro I can feel it in my gut your about to become Blys dad" Carter says slapping Parker on the back. He is rather loud which I never really noticed on video calls. Demi takes parkers hand and I see her squeeze it tightly.

"let's do this huh" Dianne says and parker places his arm around me and we start following Michael and jack. I turn back looking for Sabrina needing her support she jogs over she goes to take my hand but I pull away my hands are a little tender and open cut still. I give her a pleading look though as if to say please do not leave my side she gives a small nod and links our pinkies.

This time Parker and I sit in where the lawyers where sitting earlier and everyone behind us. I am gripping Parkers hand tightly it hurts but gripping tight to him. I dont want to be taken away from him. I feel like I am shaking nerves and fear strong.

"breath squirt" he whispers as the judge walks in we take our seat and I watch the judge trying to get a read on him trying to see if I can judge what he is going to say.

"thank you for coming back I understand today has been difficult day for you Blaire and I trust you want to get home, the case before us today is for adoption of Blaire Summer Storme. I have talked to the social worker, the case worker, and the police. It is very unusual and there are a few things I am unsure about with parker taking full guardian ship over Blaire. Your work hours at the hospital is my first concern Blaire needs someone to look after her, what about you night shifts?, your notes say you are suffer from PTSD from your time in war it worries how you may react when you have an episode. Blaire as a teenager been through what she has been through need a lot of time to help her through this, I know you are seeing a family councillor together which is great but we are worried about your reactions to Blaire when things are wrong, when she is having a PTSD episode, she is scared of people but men especially in these times, are you suited to help her through these."

"your honour may I interrupt." I hear a voice say I turn and see David standing there and I realise, the whole family is there making me smile a little and wave.

"your honour Parker has a lot of help they say it takes a village to raise a child and that is what Parker has with us, the de la Garza family. I've seen people who look after kids who have not interested in them Parker is the opposite. I have had a program where we helped kids who lost their way, I don't think there is any risk of Blaire losing her way with Parker but if she starts to we will all be there to help guide her back. Parker loves Blaire and it is clear he would do anything to make life better for Blaire, he brought her a horse because it made her happy, but he is always wanting to know more about talking and helping Blaire which is evident in the questions he ask me." David says and I smile at him before turning back to the judge who is writing it all down. I start shaking again and Parker rubs the back of my neck comfortingly.

This feels like it is taking for ever I just need the answer. The judge talks about things I can't even focus on.

"so, Parker with all that said...He pauses and I start to panic tears fill my eyes. I knew it was too good to be true, I knew they would not let me have happiness. It was inevitable, I did not put in enough effort. I should have been less moody. Today has been one of the worst days ever. I really wanted to be adopted more than anything else. I wanted to be safe. The safety I know that comes Parker and Demi but now I won't have that. All the things going through my head, all the things that can go wrong without them. I knew I should not have relied on them so much. I should not have become attached to this whole weird family unit. I feel someone shake me a little.