American girl [H.S.]

Chapter 45 - Gay Houdini

Shit.

I forgot Conner existed.

I'm such a great girlfriend, you know, with the ghosting my boyfriend and making out with another man.

Good job, Emma.

"What are you doing here Conner?" I ask, glancing sideways to see Harry, but he was gone.

"I've been calling you and coming by your house. Where have you been? You just disappeared." He says, looking very pissed.

"About that..." I say, awkwardly scratching the back of my head. "So, basically I work for the mob and I had to help them with a bunch of shit and my buddy Pauley was like 'don't sell drugs' and I was like 'I would never' and then I sold drugs and then the police caught me so I joined the witness protection program and now here we are."

"That's the plot to Goodfellas." Conner deadpans, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Nope. That's what happened I swear." I reply.

"Emma.."

"Fine. I went to go to dinner with my family and a bunch of shit happened. I'm sorry, I should've called you." I sigh.

"You didn't want to take me to dinner with your family?" He asks, looking at me like a sad puppy.

This is why it's hard to break up with him.

It's like telling a puppy you just killed it's mother.

"Conner, can we please talk about this later? I need to pick up Styles." I tell him.

"Fine, but you have to tell me everything. Don't hide shit from me again." He says.

"Okay." I nod, closing the door and sighing.

How the fuck am I supposed to tell him that I love someone else? Or that I kissed that someone else and that someone else is also living in this house and also happens to be a sexy British pop star.

Fuck.

I feel so guilty. I never should have kissed Harry and I have no idea how to tell Conner. I don't even know if I want to tell Conner.

I'm a terrible fucking person.

I used to always think it was disgusting every time someone cheated. That they were such a terrible person because they couldn't fight off urges, that they shouldn't be having about someone else by the way.

And now here I am.

A fucking disappointment.

I sigh and walk over to the kitchen to get my keys, trying to blink back tears. I see Harry sitting on a stool at the island.

"What are you doing?" I ask, my voice weak and small.

"Eating mash potatoes mixed with Pringles." He says.

"Why?"

"Why the fuck not?" He snaps, not even looking up at me.

Jeez.

I grab my keys from the counter and walk out the door, to my car.

I've never felt more drained. With everything that's happened this past week I just want to wrap myself up in a blanket and cry.

I hop in my car, starting it up and turning on the radio to try to drown at the voices in my head telling me how much I fucked up.

*play song now*

I instantly recognize the song and the air is knocked out of my lungs.

I wrote this song.