Friends Like These: Fivesome

The Solution

Bright: (suddenly interested) "Let's hear more."

Mild: (feeling upset) "I'm done talking."

Jin: "What?"

Mild: "What more do you want me to say?"

Tan: (counting his fingers) "The address, the phone number, person of refence etc"

Mild: "The question is will you afford it?"

Gulf: (bothered) "Why is that even a question?"

Mild: "basic sex services go at around fifteen hundred."

Tan: (with wide open eyes) "that much?"

Bright: (raising his hand) "I'm pledging 400 dollars so Gulf can have this service."

Tan: (raising his hand too) "I'll put in 400 too,"

Jin: "I have a nosy wife so I'll chip in 200"

Mild: "I'll put in 500  to make it fifteen hundred."

Bright: "We're set."

Tan: "When should he go?"

Gulf: (looking around and waving his hand to get their attention) "I'm here guys. Don't I have a say in this?"

Jin: (scolding Gulf) "Hey, your manhood is on the line do you think you have a say in this?"

Gulf: (scrunches his forehead with frustration) "You said my manhood,"

Tan: "That's why we are hurrying it. Because it's yours."

Mild: (jealous) "Why don't you guys be like that to get me a partner."

Bright: "Well, we gave up a long time ago."

Mild: "Did you even try?"

Tan: "All the people you met last year, where do you think they came from?"

Mild: (taken aback) "What are you talking about?"

Jin: "From Chris to Lucifer and everyone in between where do you think they came from?"

Mild: (in a duh tone) "My handsome face?"

Tan: (scoffs) "Dude, everyone you dated last year are our relatives."

Mild: (really shocked) "What!?"

Jin: "We tried mate. I can't believe I got in contact with Maria."

Gulf: (laughing) "Is that the cousin who lives the religious life?"

Jin: "Yes. She said Maria Magdalene is her role model."

Mild: "I remember her. I don't even know how I ended up going on a date with her. She came wearing clothes like a nun and it was not funny guys."

Bright: "Well we were testing your preferences."

Tan: "it was a journey of discovery."

Jin: "One that failed dismally."

Mild: "I met straight, gays, bi people. That was all ok but whose idea was it for me to meet a trans?"

Tan: "That's my special relative, and don't judge."

Mild: "I'm not judging, just that from all the people I met he was so beautiful and made me want to reconsider being a bachelor. He was that good and it scared me."

Bright: "As we highlighted before, it was a road of self discovery."

Mild: "One that I wasn't part of."

Tan: "Exactly. Where you can get friends like these?"

Mild: (opens his mouth and closes it again speechless)

Jin: "I mean we are wonderful humans."

Tan: "We are awesome."

Bright: "I agree with you."

Mild: "You're lucky I love you gents. Some monsters I saw last year, I still have nightmares."

GulF: (offended) "Hey, those are our relatives."

Mild: "I must say you guys have really weird relatives."

Bright: "It's the twenty first century dude. People do whatever."

Jin: (blurts out) "Jesus is coming back soon."

Mild: (looks at Jin) "I see why Maria is your relative."