Saving You

Chapter 18

“What the hell exactly happened Arm?! Why is Gun ended up like that?”

“I already told you Off, he’s been involved in a car accident earlier.”

“And you let him to be in a worst condition without getting any treatment? Are you insane?”

“He refused to get treated. He is stubborn like you; you also wait for the worst before coming here. You two are both hard-headed. No wonder your boyfriends. Tsk.”

“Damn it.”

“Off calm down. Don’t stress yourself too much.”

“How can I calm down knowing that my boyfriend is wounded, huh?”

“But you’re wounded too.”

“I don’t care. I’m into him first.”

I’m back to my senses. I can hear them arguing. I can hear my sister’s voice, most especially his voice...the voice that I’ve been longing to hear. But I don’t bother to open my eyes to let them know that I am already awake. In that way, maybe I will know something else that they are still keeping from me. I feel so betrayed by the persons that I trusted the most. They make me feel so stupid knowing nothing from the very start. How can they do this to me? They fooled me and told me that everything is fine even everything is so fucked up.

When I notice the long silence in the room, I slowly opened my eyes seeing them intently staring at me.

“Gun Lek. You’re awake now. How are you? Are you badly hurt? Do you feel any pain in your body? Do you want to eat something? Water? Please tell me.”

“Move Off. I’ll check on him.”

“I’m warning you Arm.”

That Arm dude chuckled. “Are you crazy? I’ll just check his vital signs. Why so possessive?”

“Cause I’m his boyfriend.”

“Oi. It’s not the right time for this. Please check my brother Doctor Arm.”

“Right.”

After a few minutes of checking, Doctor Arm leaves the room leaving the three of us in silence.

“Gun Lek...”

“Why are you here?”

“Gun Lek...”

“Can you please let me understand all of this? Can you please explain why are you here wearing a hospital gown and everything?”

“I leave you two alone. Nong Gun, we’ll talk later.” P’Alice exited herself after tapping Off’s shoulder.

“Gun Lek...”

“Stop the Gun Lek bullshit and tell me everything now!!! Don’t let me look so stupid!!!” I catch my breath after shouting.

My tears started to fall after seeing Off shed a tear while holding his IV pole tight.

“I’m so sorry Gun Lek for lying to you that I went to Chiang Mai and to every crap that I said. I’m sorry for making you feel that you are so stupid all this time.”

“Care to say what are you up to now Off?”

“I...I was diagnosed with brain tumour Gun Lek.” After saying that Off started to cry hard and I was left dumbfounded.

I...I was diagnosed with brain tumour Gun Lek...

Diagnosed with brain tumour Gun Lek...

With brain tumour...

“How...Why d-didn’t you tell me?”

“Y-you’re just getting strong again. I know you suffered a lot. You’re just building yourself again after all the pain that you’ve been through. I don’t want you to lose y-yourself again. I hate to see you being shattered. All I want for y-you is happiness and I will never forgive myself if you will feel devastated again because of m-me. I j-just thought that if I leave you early, it will be less painful than you witnessing me slowly dying and letting go your hands---” 

With all of my strength I went out of my bed and hugged him tight.

“Please don’t say it. I don’t want it. Please...”

“Gun Lek I’m dying. My time is slowly fading but I don’t want to die Gun Lek. I want to be with you, have kids with you, to grow old with you. I don’t want to die Gun Lek. Not now. Not now that I have you.

“You’re not going to die Off. Yes, you’ll have kids with me. We’re going to grow old together. All of your plans in mind, we’ll make it happen. We’ll fight together. Please don’t think of anything else. I’m here. You can lean on me Off.”

“I don’t want to die. I’m scared. Gun Lek I’m so scared.

We’re both crying so hard.  
We’re hugging each other so tight that it feels like it was the last.

But I don’t want it to be the last.

We’ll fight together Off. Trust me.