Trying to Find a Way

Chapter twenty-nine

"Are we there yet?" I whine for the billionth time.

Troy glares at me, annoyed.

"For the millionth time, we are almost there." He mumbles.

Sighing, I think about how we've been in the car for over a hour.

"You're not taking me to a dark alley and going to murder me, right?" I ask playfully.

Troy sighs.

"You caught me." He raises one arm off of the steering wheel.

I pretend to be in shock.

Troy looks over to me.

"You know I'm kidding." He says seriously.

Making tears come into my eyes, I shake my head no.

I love to see that he cares about me and loves me.

Instantly, guilt forms into his eyes. Soon enough he pulls over onto the side of the road by woods.

"I'm sorry to scare you, love." He whispers and holds my cheek.

I nod.

He kisses my lips.

"We are here," He says in the kiss, "We have to hurry."

Troy and I quickly get out of the car.

The sun is almost setting.

He takes my hand and leads me through the trees and bushes.

After five minutes of walking, Troy makes me go on his back. He says in to slow.

Somehow he is quicker with me on his back.

"Are you a vampire?" I ask as he practically runs.

He slows down.

"No I'm not." He says with a chuckle.

I nod, forgetting that he can't see me.

"Okay." I say.

He starts to speed up.

I lay my head by his neck.

"Carolina?" He asked.

"Yes." I reply.

I hadn't realized he stopped.

Embarrassed, I hop off of his back.

My focus is on the ground.

Troy lifts my head by placing his hand under me chin.

"I love you." He says.

I wrap my arms around his neck.

"I love you too." I say with a smile.

He leans in but pulls back.

A sudden pain in the heart occurs to me.

"Look." He points at something.

I turn and see the most beautiful scenery ever.

The sun is setting, and we are on a hill.

Perfect green grass runs down the hill.

I study the sun. Orange, yellow, red, and purple fill the sky. The colors dance with each other. The sun is like the mother, the colors are her children.

This moment couldn't get anymore perfect.

But it has.

Troy is with me, nothing can get more perfect than that.

I'm breathless, not even a picture can capture this beauty.

"What do you think?" Troy tilts his head to the side.

He wraps his arms around my waist.

"It-it's the most beautiful thing I have ever seen." I say to him and then look at it again.

My eyes can't seem to loose focus of the sun.

"Something is more beautiful than that." He whispers in my ear.

"What it is?" I question without looking at him.

"You." He says.

Redness creeps up on my cheeks.

I look down at the grass.

"Thank you." I say.

We sit down.

The grass feels healthy, soft even.

"How'd you find this place?" I ask as I play with the grass.

Troy doesn't reply. I turn to look up at him. His eyes have tears in them.

Suddenly my focus is on Troy. I make him turn to face me.

I place my hand on his cheek.

"What wrong?" I ask quietly.

He takes a deep breath.

"T-this i-i-is where me and T-t-Tory would come here all the time." Troy barely managed.

My heart is shattering, litterally.  I hate to see the love of my life sad, depressed, and hopeless.

I get up, pulling Troy with me and pull him into a tight hug.

Troy sobs, his shoulders move up and down.

"You're okay.  She's in a better place." I whisper into his ear.

"I know.  It's just that sometimes I feel like she's in the room with me," he says, "You probably think I'm crazy." He says and shakes his head.

"You're not crazy.  I know that she is watching over you, protecting you." I say to him.

"You think?" He asked.

I nod and smile.

"You know the weird thing though?" He asked and sits back down.

I sit down beside him.

"What?" I ask.

He pauses.

"I feel like she isn't dead, like she's still out there." He explains.

What am I suppose to say to that?

"Maybe she is." I say uncertain.

I wish she was.  There is barely one percent chance that she is out there, still alive.

"I'm asking mom tonight.  I know I saw her sick but it never felt that she died." He says with hope.

I don't want him to get his hopes up. 

"You'll be there with me, right? I know there isn't a chance really but I still have to ask." He says.

I know he doesn't want to realize that she is died.  He still wants to believe.

We head back home.

The whole time, Troy's hand was shaking.

Once we get to his house, Troy stays in the car for a minute longer.

We get out together and head to the door.

"Mom!" Troy shouts as we enter the house.

"Yes?" She asked and peaked her head out of the living room.

"Can I ask you a question?" He asked.

"Of course honey." Jordan says.

"Is Tory still alive?" He asked.

Jordan stiffens up.

"Honey you know what happen to her." Jordan says and bites her lip.

"You're lying." Troy says straight to her face.

She sighs.

"Troy I have a lot of explaining to do."