Pacifier

🌼Della🌹

"All the same..." I said, blinking up at him, wanting to look up into his eyes but needing him closer than that. Needing to feel his skin against mine, his breath fanning over my skin so that I could feel how he too was shaking with it. This sudden understanding that we were drowning in one another. That we'd wound up in too deep.

"I want you," I whispered, those words all it took for him to close the space between us and kiss me with all the depth and hunger I'd been desperate for since I'd looked back at him from where that stranger had held me hostage, their arm choking me, forcing me to still and silence myself. When I'd caught Sam's eyes as hed lied for me and saved my life, I'd understood what that lie really meant.

That when he said he wasn't on anybodys side he was lying, because he was. He was on mine.

I felt his lips move against mine and closed my eyes, melting with his touch, my insides fizzing as our movements became more frantic, more desperate for one another.

I'd never been with anyone before, never even gone this far before, never found myself lying beneath someone, letting them take my clothes off as they kissed me.

All this time I'd been playing at pretending I was just like Camille and Meghan, pretending I knew exactly what I was doing but now as Sam pulled me up with him, back into his lap, my legs around his waist, as I raised my hands above my head and let him pull his tshirt off over my head, abandoning the blood stained fabric some other side of the bed, I felt that fizz of anticipation, adrenaline, nervous desire building inside me.

So that when he kissed me again and he kissed me hard and hungry, a little moan escaped me, a lustful sort of whisper which stirred him and left him smiling into our kiss.

I caught his lip between my teeth and tugged gently, letting him take over when his tongue ran along my lip and lurred me in, my lips parting for him, letting his tongue apply pressure to mine, letting him explore my mouth whilst his hand explored my waist, sliding up over my skin to my back, unclipping my bra. He only broke the kiss to slide it off, abandon it without looking see where he might have thrown it. Looking instead only at me. 

His eyes wandered over my bare chest, down to my underwear, the only thing which covered me now, which drew a line between me and him.

I looked back at him, biting my lip, recognising that lust and that awe in his eyes, seeing what I did to him in that moment. How his mind clouded over, how he couldn't tear his gaze away from me. And I felt the power I held over him.

My heart beat in my chest, thudding against my rib cage, my breath shakey as I slipped my fingers under the elastic of his boxers and looked up, as if asking permission to tug them down.

"You ever done this before?" he asked then, breathless himself, eyes pooling with affection and despite the way he smirked at me I could sense the seriousness in his question and I knew not to lie, shaking my head, holding his gaze as a small smile twitched his lips.

"You get to be my first," I smirked, low voice trying to seduce him, only realising with his next words that I didn't need to try to do that.

"As long as I get you be your last," he said, lips reconnecting with mine as he let his thumb brush over my sensitive spot through my underwear, watching to see my reaction, watching to see how I'd bite my lip to hold back a smile at the glimmer of pleasure he sent through me like water lapping over me.

It was warm and staticy and it made my hips roll instinctively into his so that he wound up one hand on my hip to hold me in place. His nose nuzzled into my neck as he dragged his lips across my sensitive skin, whispering sweet things in my ear, asking me if I was his, feeling his smile through his kisses when I nodded and mewled into his hair that I was.