Pacifier

🥀Sam🌹

I stood behind her, my chin hovering just above her shoulder. Every breath I took breathing a little of her in.
She smelt sweet, this strange mix of my shower gel and the garden in the early hours of the morning, the damp grass we stood on and the pollen in the trees.

I'd woken her up early and now we stood bare feet on the concrete in the back garden. Aiming at an empty milk bottle at the end of the garden. It wasn't ideal but in the circumstances it would have to do.

I stood behind her, holding her hands which held the little pistol I'd told her she could keep once she proved to me she could shoot it. Beneath my touch I could feel her bare skin, the shiver of her arms in the early morning cold. It was brisk. I could feel the chill in my cheeks, i could see our breaths rising slowly up towards the sun.

From where I stood, the flutter of her eyelashes, the slow rise and fall of her chest, were making it very difficult for me to concentrate.

"Ey careful," i cracked a grin when she turned quickly, pushed the gun to my forehead with a cheeky smirk.

"Its not even loaded," she giggled at me and the way I had flinched, her smile bright and easy.

She was such a different girl this morning than she had been for the last week.

This morning she'd woken up changed. As if she'd healed over night. Suddenly permanently smirking, suddenly cool, shrugging her shoulders. And she didn't seem scared of me.

Not scared like she had been scared the night before.

"I could though," she smirked, eyes twinkling with a teasing light despite the apparent seriousness of her threat. "If it was loaded..." she said, trailing, teasing me, "What would you do?" she asked pouting when I stood up a little straighter, pushed the barrel away with the tip of my finger, gently, easily.

"Trust me darlin a loaded gun feels very different," i smirked, "now come on you, dya want to learn or not..." I cracked a grin, laughed her off, taking the little pistol from her, holding her hands out in front of her, closing her fingers around the it slowly.

Her eyes fixed on mine, sent a swirl of uncertainty through me and as I returned to her side, standing close behind her, my arms following the line of her arms, my hands on her hands, my chin hovering just over her shoulder, I sensed a shift in her.

Her smile faded, replaced with pursed lips, slow shallow breaths, the chewed cheek of concentration. Her eyes narrowed as she focused in on her target.

"Take your time lass," i breathed, watching her, watching the way she shook only for a second before she stilled them. Watching the rise and fall of her chest as she adjusted herself slowly.

Her finger twitched on the trigger as I gently guided her in line with the little glass bottle we were aiming for.

We didn't have long but I had already decided we'd take this slowly. I wasn't sure I trusted her not to turn that trigger on me just yet so I was going to drag each lesson out, excruciatingly slow steps until I was certain she trusted me, or until her brothers made it safe for her to go home.

We had to be back inside by sunrise to lower the risk of us being seen by any neighbours, by anyone who might be looking. Interested in the new girl who'd moved in.

Rumours travel fast this end of town.
One sighting of a little brunette with her brothers eyes would be enough. We'd have the Reids on our doorstep in no time, and they wouldn't knock.

"Wait," she bit her lip, i felt my cheek brush her cheek, I felt her bristle at my touch. Her breath hitched but I'd never have known if we weren't stood as close as we were in that moment.