Pacifier

// Van \\

It wasn't a normal night at The Balcony and as I watched Isabellejump up into her brothers arms, her legs wrapping round his waist, chin on his shoulder, all worn out, I felt a guilty knot in my stomach. As her eyes fluttered shut, that guilty knot twisted.

"Van you gotta tell me whats going on mate..." Bob said leaning over the bar to talk to me. "Why's there a rumour goin round the lads that Billy Reids on his way round here? And who was that lad yous and Bondy just cornered? And wheres Blakes?" he asked trying to hide his frantic almost jittery nature as he poured a glass of whiskey.

"Because he is," i leant back against the bar, swallowing down hard, eyes wandering over to Izzy, her eyes blinking under her fkatcap as she gazed around the room, still half asleep on her brothers shoulder. "I invited him round, to discuss... Business," i paced myself, that slow and steady confidence you only ever hear in someone who has spent a lot of time thinking something through.
And I'd spent a lot of time thinking this one through.

Days, everyday, sitting in my chair in my office alone, sometimes with Isabellelying across the rug in my office reading her book and blushing every time she caught my gaze trailing her. I'd spent sleepless nights trying to decide what was right, what was the best way to beat them at their own game. Every morning I had awoken with it on my mind.

"Have you lost it?" Bob was looking at me stunned, "you've invited him here?!" more than stunned he looked horrified.

"Yes," i said turning away from Isabelleto lean across the bar, sip my whiskey and explain myself to him, "I've invited him to come take a walk through our warm establishment, where he will find that his families little attack on ours has left our home unscathed. When he gets here he will be greeted with music, a bar overflowing, happy members of ths community, merry and drunk, carefree and most importantly, still loyal to us... And he will see Ismae, surrounded by very dangerous men and he will think twice about letting his boys send her threats through her school books." I hadn't finished but Bob was smirking softly and I knew U had said enough to make him realise that I had in fact not lost the plot at all. That I was still painfully sane. Painfully calculated.
That every inch of this plan had been fine tuned.

"And whilst Billy Reid is sitting with me at that table in the middle of the room over there, our Blakes is gonna be out, pulling our girls from his streets, spilling a little blood and a lot of Billy Reids notoriety... So when he gets here and you serve his drink, make sure its the strongest whiskey we've got because by the time we're finished tonight, hes gonna need it..." I finished nodded to Bondy from across the room when a shadow outside the window caught our eyes at the same time.

I watched him set Isabelledown on the floor, tell her to go on up to bed now, watched her refuse, shake her head and put the face on.
I longed to intervene, longed to light up those sullen eyes myself, but I had planned a routine. I'd planned every moment from now until i lay my head on my pillow that night, intricately.

"What about that kid..." started Bob but I cut him off.

"We don't know the kid, he's not important," i shrugged though I had the feeling that when I spoke to Isabellea little later on she would change my mind on that one too.

I waited leaning up against bar, sipping my whiskey, just watching the door, just waiting. Running over the steps we would all be taking, sparing a thought for Benji and the war he was about to wage all by himself.

I hadn't been able to spare anyone else to go with him, if too many had gone thered have been enough people missing round our table for Reid to notice. We needed him to notice, but not too soon.

Still Blakes was one of our best.

I spared a glance over in Bondys direction, he had returned to our usual table, his little sister following him around the room. Now she sat on the table, her legs dangling from it carefree and swinging gently. She couldn't have known how tempting that was for me. The visions her silhouette enchanted me with.