Chapter 46: Fading

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Dallas's POV
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It rises. And rises. It consumes me, like a dark cloud covering the sky.

The part of me I've hidden for so long is finally escaping and racing up and down my spine to cause prickles beneath my skin. I itch. And then there's the unbearable pain in my teeth. When they elongate, it doesn't go away. A headache takes over my mind, hurting me and making it feel as if my brain is rotting.

Heavy breathing. Is that from Nicole or from me?

Me. It's from me.

My eyes darken, revealing the wolf in me. I hold in a growl, knowing how savage that would sound and how animalistic. Nicole just stares at me with her watery blue eyes.

"Dallas. Give in completely." I hiss, frustrated that she was able to tell I wasn't planning on giving in fully. She leans forward, kissing my chin. The wolf in me is unsettled and stirring. This rawness I'm feeling; it feels amazing. I feel free of myself. Of my worries. Of my fears.

Except for one fear that I still hold onto. I will not allow myself to harm or take advantage of Nicole. I won't allow it.

A growl rips through me and Nicole grins. "That all you got?" She taunts. Why is she taunting me?

My head bows as I shudder slightly in front of her. My hands are white from the pressure I'm putting on them against the wall. She stands in between them, watching me.

I let out a breath, feeling more of myself give way to that raw, bare, freedom feeling. Just as I said, I can't stop. I can't stop this need. Maybe I won't Mark Nicole. Maybe I'll just give in to myself and then be fine.

I realize just how pathetic that sounds.

I suddenly lurch forward, surprising both Nicole and I when I kiss her. I feel like my blood is boiling. Everything aches and I know exactly why and how to make it stop, yet even at the brink of completely giving in, I'm still scared.

I surprised her. I wasn't gentle. That's what she wanted, but I still surprised her.

Pulling away, I breathe hard, feeling as if I ate a tornado. Why haven't I done this sooner?

I notice Nicole's slightly out of breath as well. "Not even fully free and yet I can sense it." She says. I can't take it.

I jerk forward, my face right next to her neck. I'm so close. My breath brushes her neck and she shivers.

"You okay, Dal?" Comes her voice next to my ear. I'm not going to lie.

"No." My teeth tingle from being so close. I have to fight the urge just so I can talk. Nicole doesn't say anything, hoping I'll elaborate. "Everything ... Everything hurts. And I'm scared." My voice is rough and scratchy, surprising both of us. My voice is normally hoarse and rough from my damaged vocal box, but it seems even more crackly than usual, if that's possible. I can tell she's also surprised by what I said.

"Why are you scared? Because you're afraid you'll hur -" I cut her off with a wolf-like growl. I'm slipping even more. I let out a breath, stirring the hair around her ear.

"That's not the only reason I'm scared, Nicole. Heck, that's not even most of it; that's nothing. I know I won't hurt you or myself. I'm just scared. I'm scared of Marking you." She turns her head slightly, unable to complete the motion because of my face so close. I don't bother moving.

"I'm scared, too." I wait for her to say more. "For you to say you're scared... That makes me scared. You're hardly afraid of anything." I snort.

"Nicole, I'm scared of so many things, I don't have enough fingers to count them all." I admit quietly, resting my forehead against her shoulder.

"What about toes, too?" Letting out a throaty laugh, I kiss her shoulder affectionately.

"Toes, too, Nicole."

"What are you afraid of?" Her question startles me, almost making me fall.

"Marking you. Loosing my dad. Loosing you. Hurting you. Failing my pack. Shall I go on?" I feel the huge weight of my stress lifting, whether it's from loosing myself or from finally telling someone, I don't know.

I feel her lips against the bottom of my neck and prevent myself from shivering.

"What if I don't do it right, Nicole? What if everything changes?" Nicole sighs. "What if I do something that'll make you regret me Marking you?"

"Dalla-"

"People told me all about what it's like to Mark someone; what it does. They were always so happy. That's what scares me. I've never Marked anyone before, obviously, and I don't know... I don't know what to think. In terrified." I intake a sharp breath as soon as I stop talking when I feel Nicole kissing up my neck. My muscles bunch; tense.

"Don't be scared. I wouldn't regret it if my life depended on it, Dal." She stops talking and then continues shyly. "I love you."

"I love you so much more." I respond quietly. My logical brain is flying out the window, leaving me eyeing her neck. She grips my ribs.

"Stop holding back, Dallas."

"I should have done this a long time ago."

My last words before I become an animal. It feels good to let go.

I lurch forward, my breath fast against her neck. Multiple growls leave my lips. Her scent surrounds me, encasing me.

I gently kiss her neck and feel my canines lengthen. With a grunt, my teeth start digging into her neck. The painful pressure behind my canines starts fading as I push my teeth harder into her neck, finally breaking the skin. Nicole groans, her hands squeezing my ribs and I close my eyes.

I didn't realize I have been waiting for this for what feels like forever.

I moan softly against her neck, the tension in me draining out. Her blood starts seeping into my mouth, metallic and bitter. After slowly pulling out my teeth from her neck, a breathy sigh leaves my bloodied lips.

Ictus growls approval in my head and takes control of me for a moment, just enough to lick the blood away from the puncture in her skin.

I'm shaking. I need to lean against something.

But I'm concerned about Nicole. I look at her. She's looking at me. And then she looks at something behind me.

I turn, wiping at the blood on my mouth, to see my father and a doctor standing right in front of me.

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