His wife

>red victory<

As I notice that, I hold my breath. Clueless about what will happen next, cluesless about what to do and how to react. Though unlike you thought, he puts his cheek on mine as he whispers calmly into my ear ''The purest angel amoungst them all, and the sweetest soul as well.'' Once again my cheeks heat up, though this time he can't see it, he can feel the warmth on his.

Slowly he moves his cheek away from mine, kisses mine and then just stares into my eyes to wait for a reaction. Meanwhile I just stare at him still cluelessly because I have no idea why he'd do that and therefore what it means. All I know is that Josef's eyes calmly look into mine while I feel guilty for not knowing what to do.

But I also can't sit here for hours and overthinking the meaning of a simple gesture like I'd need to. So all I do is to strech a bit into lenght and softly press my lips against his cheek as well, though way faster than he kissed my cheek, way more innocently.

His lips form a smile as he once again sees a proof for my youthful innocence. After a while of staring in silence, he starts to play piona again, though due to every muscle in my body already aching, I remain next to him and just listen to his calm playing while closing my eyes.

To me it's still uncertain why I kissed his cheek, though perhaps because I didn't know what else to do. But what I know is that technically it should have felt wrong, at least so the bible says. That was an act of adultery and yet I might feel guilty, though not like I did something wrong. It really is time that I get to church to confess this mess.

While my thoughts are once again going wild, I open one eye for a second to look at him and find him staring at me in a soft way.
If someone could just tell me where this road is headed to.

2nd of February 1943 Berlin, Nazi-Germany

''Can we listen to the radio?'' I ask in a quite child-like tone while Josef already sits down to eat dinner.

For a while now we have been seeing each other quite regularly and always in the flat of his friend because shortly after our first- date, he was called to the eatern front. Though I still keep on living in the hotel after I payed them more so I could stay longer. By now I've grown more calm around him, though I still react the same way as I did before whenever he holds my hand or kisses me goodnight on the cheek. You must understand that I am simply overwhelmed by this and still not sure what to do.

''Of course.'' He says calmly while already starting to eat the dinner I cooked for us; it's a German dish, so I hope I haven't accidentally done anything wrong.

Softly I turn on the radio and immediately I want to turn it off again. Satan is speaking. I try to look unbothered by this as I sit down opposite to Josef who listens carefully to his Führer. ''His voice alone doesn't sound like he has something good to tell.'' The man opposite to me remarks while I notice how weird Hitler sounds. Admittingly it took me some seconds to know it was really him. His voice just sounds very odd to me when he is speaking like this. ''Quite unusual that he isn't shouting.''

What I just remarked might have sounded innocently but I just voiced my own opinion, what I really thought. Therefore I instantly regret having said that. It seems like I grew a bit too comfortable around Josef, else I wouldn't have loosened my tongue like that.

Though he doesn't seem to have heard my comment, he is focued solely on what Hitler is announcing. ''... that we got defeated at the battle of Stalingrad.'' There both Josef and I drop our forks. The moment he hears that Stalingrad didn't fell, our silver forks hit the ground, they fall like so many soldiers who fought there.

My face immediately lights up as I hear these words and even though I try, I can't surpress a smile of pure happiness. They surrendered at Stalingrad! That by far is the biggest defeat they had and it also means that we finally are pushing them out, that means that our chance of defeating the Nazis grew. And that also means that both my brother and Vasily are more likely to have made it out of the boiler of Stalingrad alive. Out alive of Stalingrad the mass grave.