•Purple•

~57~ It cant happen

"No...we cant Calvin," Cameron answered softly. Calvin raised his eyebrow and glared at him. "No? What do you mean 'no'?" Calvin asked. Cameron sighed and pushed the boy away. "We're not going to try. Not again. After everything I've put myself through- everything I've put you through." He said, "I can't let you go through that again." He continued. Calvin puts his hand on Cameron's cheek. "We won't. And if we do, we will get through it. Together." He assures him. Cameron grabbed his hands and shook his head. "No, we won't." He replied softly. "Why not! Don't you want to try again? I'm sure we will do better this time." Calvin responded. But Cameron just shook his head. "We can't. You know we can't." He tells him. "Why not?" Calvin asked him. Cameron sighed and pushed the boy off. "You and I both know this won't work out. Sooner or later we will find something to fight about. We're very different people, Cal." Cameron tried to explain. "Yeah, very different people who have feelings for one another." Calvin said, "You can't tell me that you've been faking everything all the time." Calvin argued. A weak smile appeared on his lips as he shook his head. "You might be able to do this, but I can't. I'm sorry." Cameron tells the boy. "So, that's it? You're just going to give up on us? Why can't you love me back?" Calvin asked. "There was never an 'us' or a 'we', Calvin!" Cameron exclaimed. Calvin glared at him making Cameron sigh loudly. He runs his hand through his hair. "We have gotten ourselves into so much trouble. Do you know how mad my father was after we got wasted that one night?" He asked him, "Do you know how much more pain I've been through because of you?" He continued. "So you blame me for your abusive father?" He questioned. Cameron shook his head. "No, of course not." He sighed, "Of course, I have feelings for you. Of course, I want to be with you. But it can't happen. We can't happen." He tells the boy. "But why not?" Calvin asked. "Because we can't. Our relationship is toxic. We can't have what I had with Brenna. We can't have what Brody and Emily have. I want what's best for you. I want what's best for you because I love you. That's why this can't happen." Cameron explained to him. Calvin stepped closer to him again. He puts his hands on his chest while looking into his eyes. "I want this to happen." He whispered. Cameron smiled at him. He puts both of his hands on his cheeks. "I do too. And I love you." He said. Calvin smiled at him. He leaned forward to kiss him. But Cameron stopped him. "I'm going back home." He tells Calvin. "What?" Calvin's smile dropped. "We moved here because of my father's new job. We have no use in staying here any longer with him gone. But my mother isn't leaving. She doesn't want my sister to go through all of it again. I'm going back. I need some time for myself, you know?" Cameron informs him. "N-no...no you can't leave," Calvin spoke. Cameron sighed and grabbed Calvin's hands. "Please, you can't leave." Calvin whispered, "Please, you can't leave me." He added. Cameron sighed and kissed his knuckles. "I have to. I don't want to stay here anymore." He tells Calvin, "This is the best. For the both of us." He continued. Calvin shook his head. "Don't leave. Please, please, don't leave me." He begged him. "This is the best for the both of us," Cameron tells him. Both boys stood there for a while. In silence. Cameron was moving back home? "For how long?" Calvin asked him. "A while." Cameron answers. "Are you coming back?" Calvin questions. Cameron smiled at him. He pushed some of Calvin's hair back. "Can't leave my family all alone. And I can't leave you either." He tells him. Calvin sighed and rests his head on his chest. Cameron wraps his arms around Calvin. "I have to get back to class." He whispered. "Can't we stay like this for a little while?" Calvin asked. "If you explain it to my teacher." Cameron replies.