Don't Give Up

Chapter 9 - Worse

Saturday, February 21st

I woke up to the sound of Bradley being sick, again.

He had woken me up about 3 times in the night being sick so I should of expected this.

I bought in a sick bucket to him last night because I couldn't stand for sick being all over my carpet and he merely said thank you.

After letting myself wake up a little I began rubbing his back to try and sooth him.

"How much did you drink last night?" I asked softly hoping he'd be in a calmer mood than last night.

"Are you joking? I wake up for 5 minutes and I'm being questioned already" He said before throwing up again.

I just rolled my eyes at him even though he couldn't see. I could already tell this was going to be a bad day.

"I'm only looking out for you Brad"

"Yeah well don't" He said batting my hand away from his back. "I'm nearly twenty, I don't need some idiotic fan thinking they can help me, just leave me alone" He replied.

Now this time his words actually hurt. I could deal with it when he was drunk but not when he was sober. That's obviously all he really thinks of me.

I should of stood up for myself but I have no energy, I don't want to fight, I just want the old Brad back.

I laid back down in my bed turning around so I didn't have to face him. I put my head phones in trying to block out the sounds of my boyfriends spewing.

I just shut my eyes, attempting to block everything out. I even ignored the nudging I soon felt on my back. I couldn't be bothered with him, not after that, not today.

He must of shouted loud as I heard his husky voice through the head phones and then, as always, it was followed by the slamming of doors.

He's only had about 7 bad days since the split and every time he acts like a child.

I don't know what I can do to help him anymore.

If I text him, he won't reply.
If I ring him, he won't answer.
If I question him, he gets angry.
If I try to help him, he says he doesn't need it. He is a hard piece of work.

I dragged myself up from my bed, putting on my work clothes. I couldn't miss work for another day, they said they would fire me and without that I have no income to help pay for the roof over my head.

I know I should be out looking for my boyfriend but I don't even know where to start.

Plus I need something to take my mind off of the situation. It makes me feel physically ill, I just want to break down but I have to stay strong. I'm not the type of person to let people see me crying my eyes out.

I walked into the kitchen writing a little note for Bella and Tris because they were still asleep and I had a morning shift.

I've gone to work, it's a split shift but I'll probably just hang around there or grab something for lunch close by. I can't deal to come home right now. If you hear anything from Brad please text me! I'll see you later x x

I left the note by the kettle knowing that the first thing Bella does in the morning is make herself a cup of tea.

I left the apartment locking it behind me before walking to work.

It was a short journey luckily and the whole time I kept my eyes peeled for Brad but nothing, I sort of want to forget the situation anyway.

I arrived and they were happy to see me.