I will always love you....

Chapter 41

Draco POV
(My feet took me to the lake. So many memories acaparated me when lay on the fresh grass, staring at the lake before me.  Tears were still formed into my eyes, begging to be released. Since Y/n lost her memory,  I never cried.  But I needed to...in order to heal.  I remembered precisely everytime we came here, it was our spot. Along with the Astronomy tower...but now, they are just shadows hunting me down. Eating my soul piece by piece, and I let them. Because I refused to cry.)

(A Malfoy never cries, my father used to say that frequently, and like the coward I was, and still am, I assumed that it was true. That a parent could never lie to their children.  When I recalled that memory, that powerful one, which now is breaking my heart, something in me snapped. Her smile, her hope and desire to be together again after what Parkinson did to us was to much.  My head dropped in my hands and clenched my jaw so hard, it became physically painful.)

Draco: Stop replacing angriness with tears! (I yelled, some crawls flying from the tree.)

(My gaze fell onto the dark sky and I let the tears fall. It was weird, but it felt good.  It felt right.  The more tears that are  running down, the more I will feel better. I eliberated the pain, that remained there for all my life. All those years, my father mentally abusing me, the lost of Y/n's memory, all the pain is almost gone.  I felt guilty for pushing Y/n away, for refusing her help, for not trusting her. I realized.  It's still her, no matter what.)

(No matter how much I struggle to find a way, to trigger something that might bring her memory back, it's worthless. I used so much time thinking about that, that I haven't seen her now. I didn't live in the present.  I wiped my tears away and rushed inside the castle, trying to find her, tell her everything that I feel for her. Everything that I felt from the moment she lost herself. But I found her, she is not lost. She is confused.  I opened slowly the door to our dorm room, only to find her sleeping peacefully in her bed, hugging her knees to her chest.  I took a blanket and covered her inchmeal not to wake her. My fingers slowly caressed her cheek, when I felt them. Dried tears.)

Draco: Why are you crying every day, my love?
(I whispered to myself,  When I recalled her words.  I don't know who I am anymore...  I felt my heart sink, drowning in the darkness, broking into pieces at her suffering. Her desperation to obtain answers it hadn't calmed down. I knew her too well. And this, I don't know where it will lead, how far it would lead.  I fell asleep after hours of battling with myself, wondering for her.  For the only girl that I love.)

Y/n POV
(In the morning, Draco's bed was empty, as always. I looked into the mirror and when I saw myself, I cried. Again. My cheeks were pale, my head was pounding and eyes were puffy and red. I grabbed my makeup and aplied some, something I do really rare. But this was an emergency. I looked awful, everyone would know how I actually was, my suffering for something I know I'm not going to obtain. My eyes were like a mirror; reflecting my broken soul, to the ones that examined near enough.  After I changed, I walked down the stairs to the Great Hall. I saw my friends as usual sitting together and laughing at some stupid jokes Blaise replied, and it made me smile. Seeing them so joyful.)

Hermione: Hey, Y/n!

Blaise: Morning, sleepyhead. 

Y/n: Sleepyhead? (I raised my eyebrows  taking a seat and everyone laughted.)

Blaise: Well, yes, you usually don't wake up so late. 

Y/n: Ah, yeah, I umm–didn't get much sleep last night. 

Ginny: Are you alright? 

Y/n: Yes, just I'm going with Draco today you know at the Malfoy Manor and I'm kinda nervous.  (I swallowed hard.  Ron spitted his pumkin juice in his plate and everyone playfully made disgusted faces.)

Harry: Ron, what on Merlin's name– 

Ron: You're going where?! (He almost shouted making everyone silent.)

Y/n: You know Ron? I think is the first time I heard you speaking properly, I bit out a laugh. 

Harry: Are you sure? (He asked, pure worry written on his face.)

Y/n: Yes, Harry, I'm perfectly sure, I assured him, but everyone eyed me in suspicion.  My gaze searched for the blonde slytherin the entire room, until I found him and my face fell. He was alone. Again. My eyes couldn't leave him.)

Hermione: Y/n?

Y/n: Yes? 

Hermione: Go to him
(She said with the most honesty I ever saw in her.  I noded and smiled, walking over the slytherin table in the corner. When I placed my glass and platter on the table, his grey eyes instantly met mine and his face lit up.)

Draco: What are you doing here?
(He asked softly, quite surprised.)

Y/n: I thought you needed some company.  (His grin grew and eyed me up and down.)

Draco: Are you going to tell me? 

Y/n: What? I asked uncertain.

Draco: Come on Y/n, you know. Why did you cry last night? 

Y/n. He said my name. (I smiled and bit my lip.)

Y/n: I–what about you? Last night? 

Draco: Don't even try to change the subject.
(He laughted and couldn't stop smiling at him.  He was out of the ordinary from the lasts days. More happy.)

A/n
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