(3) Not the Same: An All Time Low Fanfiction Romance

Chapter 15: Go Back (Lauren's POV)

        I rushed up to my apartment after I got out of the car, harboring an irrational idea that Zack would somehow be outside my apartment. It was like that silly childhood feeling where after you turn off the lights, a monster will suddenly be waiting for you under your bed, ready to grab your toes when you came near. It was stupid, because I knew Zack wouldn't have tried to follow me, especially after I ran.

        He'd been caling my name, clearly wanting to speak with me for whatever reason, but I hadn't stopped. I hadn't even looked back. I knew it would uspet him. And I'm sure he noticed how i didn't stop to put my headphones back in or try to wipe the sand off my skin or clothes, and I'm sure that'd made everything worse.

        I couldn't imagine how they were talking about me. Zack would have been mad at Stella and Alex because they didn't tell him, whether it was because he wanted to talk to me, or avoide me, I wasn't sure. He didn't look angry when he'd realized it was me who'd run into him, and he didn't sound angry when he called after me.

        Maybe he'd just wanted to talk, to get to the bottom of everything that had happened, but I hadn't given him the chance to try again.

        Communication was our problem before. Zack had been on tour with limited time to call. I had college, work and as much as I hated to admit it, I had Craig. He was my best friend, and at first it had been easier to hang out with him while the guys were gone because I was closest to him. I started to hang out with Stella, while still making time for Craig, making myself available whenever he'd gotten in trouble or needed me to help him.

        The longer Zack was away, the more time I spent with Craig. There was less communication, more fighting and the feeling that I was absolutely nowhere, so I left.

        Never, in the last six years, did I think I'd be like this again, with Stella and the guys.

        I thought about it for hours, thinking about where things could go from here. I had so many situations playing out in my head, most of them illogical. I was overthinking everything. It was simple. I would either talk to him again, or not. I just hadn't made up my mind yet.

        I only stopped thinking about everything when my phone rang, and I reached for it hesitantly, thinking it was Stella, wanting to talk about what happened. I made sure I checked before this time, something that caused problems for me before, and was shocked to say the least, that Craig's name was flashing on the screen.

        I answered it, holding the phone to my ear as I stood to move from the family room to the kitchen, wanting something to eat. "Hey," I answered softly, using my shoulder to cradle my phone as I reached to open up the cabinets. "I'm a litte surprised to hear from you."

        "I've got a few minutes before I head out, thought you might like to hear my voice. I know how much you miss it," He teased, and I could easily imagine him smirking on the other end.

        "So, what are you up to?" I asked, grabbing a box of cereal and a bowl. It was one of the easiest things to prepare.

        "Just waiting for a couple people I met yesterday. We're going out. What about you? How was your day?"

        I stared down at my empty bowl, reaching to hold my phone in my hand again before slowing shaking the box, letting the cereal fall. I sighed, shaking my head to myself before answering. "Uh, it's been fine. I haven't really done anything," I muttered. If I had free hands I could prepare myself for rubbing my nose, and Craig would know automatically that I was lying. I thought he wouldn't suspect anything, but I hadn't been convincing when I talked, and it didn't take a genuis to hear that my tone was off.

        "God, I didn't think you were this bad of a liar, Laur," he chuckled. "Somebody's going to have to teach you how to lie. What happened?"

        "Nothing happened, Craig," I said defensively, setting the box of cereal down and pushing it away.

        "Then why are you getting defensive? What happened, Laur?" he pressed. I pushed my lips together in a tight line, annoyed at how he was pestering me. It was stupid that this was irritating me, but I just didn't want to tell him. It wasn't that I wanted to hide it, I just wanted to figure everything out before I told him, so I'd know how to answer him when he asked what I was going to do next.

        "I ran into Zack today, okay!" I snapped, getting him to stop asking. "I seriously ran into him," I closed my eyes waiting for him to reply.

        "Wait, you mean you literally, physically, ran into him?" Craig questioned, sounding like he'd been laughing. I scowled, wanting to hang up the phone, but if I did, I didn't know when I'd be talking to Craig again.

        "Yes, I was going for a run and they were at the beach,  and I wasn't paying attention and ran straight into him and we fell over," I explained, turning to lean my back against the counter, crossing my arm over my chest, resting my elbow on my wrist.

        "What'd he say?" Craig asked, sounding genuinely concerned, as if Zack would have been angry or rude.

        "Nothing, I didn't give him a chance to say anything. I sort of ran away." I admitted.

        "Are you going to see him again?" he asked, and I bit my lip, thinking. I hadn't figured that part out yet.

        "I don't really know, he seemed like he wanted to talk to me..." I stumbled to a stop mid-sentence, hearing Craig's voice firm in my ear.

        "You shouldn't talk to him," he was saying, "It's not a good idea to see him, Laur."

        I hesitated, mouth open slightly as I searched for something to say. All I could think to ask was, "Why?" Why would Craig not want me talking to Zack, to try and figure things out between us? Why was he sounding so determined to tell me to avoid him?

        "I just don't think you should talk to him," he answered. "He's already messed with you once, leaving for tour and barely talking to you, his own girlfriend," He continued, but this time I cu thim off.

        "He was busy, Craig. That's not his fault. He's in a band, he has concerts and appearances. He's not like you, he didn't call me because he was too busy hanging out with other people and doing god-knows-what. He didn't call because he barely had time to," I accused, not even thinking before I spoke. After I finished, I replayed it in my head, hearing how terrible I sounded.

        I knew what I was saying was true, Zack rarely had time to call when he was on tour. I knew that he tried, but at the time it hadn't been enough, and with Craig on his trip, maybe I shouldn't have said what I said, but there was no denying that he had more free time than Zack did, and it was far easier for him to text or call than it was for Zack.

        I held my breath, waiting, until Craig spoke again.

        "Okay, Lauren. Do whatever you want them. I thought you wanted to get away from all that. I thought that's why we came to California together. You can go back and let them pull you in again. Go back to exactly what you left behind."