Hiding From Us

52. zack

On Sunday evening, at quarter to nine, my sister interrupted my video gaming to take me to a movie. She barged into my room, wearing an overlarge hoody and ripped jeans, and she announced that we were going to see the new Hunger Games movie, which I hadn’t been planning to go to previously. But I went, because Wyatt was yelling at Mom and Mom was yelling at Dad and Dad was yelling at the football game. We took Audrey’s car, and for some reason, I marveled at the fact that my birthday was in four months, and I would be old enough to drive soon. 

     ‘‘How are you and your girlfriend doing?’’ Audrey asked.

     I had to think for a moment before I answered. ‘’Um,’’ I said, ‘’I don’t know.’’

     She didn’t say anything for a while. When she did, her voice was quiet. ‘‘You know this isn’t going to last, right? This is only your first relationship and you’re only, what, almost fifteen.’’

     I said, ‘’I know.’’ 

     We arrived at the theatre. Audrey paid for my ticket and ordered my snacks for me, because she knew what I wanted—cherry coke, buttered popcorn with cheddar flavoring, and a mint Aero bar. We found seats in the back of the theatre. 

     During the trailers, Audrey pulled out her phone and texted someone quick, and I snuck a look at her screen; she was messaging some guy named Peter. (The thing about Audrey’s generation was that a lot of them had really old fashioned names, and it didn’t matter that they’d only been born in 1998.) I didn’t read the whole conversation, but I did catch a couple of swearwords in the messages.

     She put her phone away. I asked, ‘‘Who’s Peter?’’

     ‘’Um,’’ said Audrey, ‘‘Peter is an asshole who periodically messed up my life. Why do you ask?’’

     ‘‘Because you guys were, like, swearing at each other.’’

     ‘’Oh, that.’’ She waved her hand indifferently. ‘’He was dating my friend but he ended up cheating on her and I started getting pissy at him so he started getting pissy back. No biggy.’’

     ‘‘Who’d he cheat on her with?’’

     ‘‘You’re an extremely nosy kid, aren’t you?’’

     I blushed. ‘’I just—I can help you decide how big of an asshole he is, I guess.’’

     ‘’Oh, he’s pretty damn big.’’

     ‘‘Who was it?’’

     She shook her head and replied after a moment, ‘’It was nobody. Don’t worry about it.’’ Her voice was tight.

     So I didn’t worry about it. I sat back and ate my buttered popcorn and drank my cherry coke and got my hands sticky with my Aero bar. The movie was okay. I didn’t really know half of the story since I hadn’t watched the first two films, but most of it made sense. Katniss was pretty, I decided. Gale was heroic. Peeta was deranged. 

     Near the end of the film, when District 13 was sending in a squad to rescue Peeta from the Capitol, I told Audrey I was leaving for the bathroom. I didn’t tell her that the scene reminded me of a scary movie scene I’d watched when I was younger. I’d been four or five and I couldn’t get to sleep, so I crept out into the hallway to find my parents, who’d been watching this horror movie that I couldn’t remember the name of. Anyway, they were at a scene where a group of people were peeking in doors, trying to find some serial killer or something, and then this guy with a knife ambushed them and started stabbing the knife into their throats, one by one, spraying blood everywhere. And after they all lay on the ground, half dead and half alive, the guy laughed. He laughed like he was having the most fun he could ever have, and little five-year-old me got so scared that I pissed my pants, thus leading to my parents finding me squatted in the hallway beside a square of wet carpet, tears running down my face.