Man of the Match | DaiSuga

Chapter 36

Sugawara POV :

I walked home alone, after Daichi abandoned me at the station. He looked ready to burst, or implode? He was carrying his emotions in a bag and it looked like the bag was about to break as he began to speed walk away from me. I ended up getting into my house at 10:45pm. I'd been out all day, my feet hurt from walking around and my heart hung heavy after the kiss. I didn't regret it, I enjoyed it and the more I thought about it, the less apologetic I became. I enjoyed it, it felt right, I won't apologise for that. I got into the house and threw my shoes off, walking into the bathroom and turned on the shower. "If he has a problem then that isn't my fault." I mumbled looking at myself in the mirror. I looked bordering angry, defensive. He has no right to kiss me and leave me like that. No that ain't on Daichi Sawamura. I found myself clenching the sides of the sink, looking at myself stood there in my binder. 

Why run away? Why push me out?  Why push me out after trying so hard to get back close to me? You dickhead Daichi! 

I found myself idly scrolling through social media, nothing catching me eye. I needed to shower but my emotions not sitting right caused me to view showering as too much effort. I was stood before the bathroom mirror, scrolling through my socials - hoping there would be something to distract me from, maybe a news story to direct my anger at. I took a mirror selfie of myself in my binder, I looked good today. I had toned up due to playing volleyball, with my chest looking flat, my hair falling in my face - I looked hot. Not to brag but I was looking mighty fine. 

Sadly, there was nothing to distract me on social media, and after my mirror selfie photoshoot my brain was back to being bored and thinking about a certain black haired captain. What do I feel for you Daichi? I started trying my best to think what I felt for Daichi. I went to my bedroom, not bothering to shower after all as I laid on my bed looking that pictures I had snagged of today. Daichi smiling under the autumn leaves, the picture of him in the gardens. The picture we took together in the café, the pictures I took of him trying to get into the boat on the moat - him nearly falling into the water twice. I found myself laughing and smiling a the photos as my heart began to swell. 

I looked at how perfect he looked in the photos, he seemed to be shining. When he acts like he loves me, it feels like I'm the only person around. When he is sweet with me it feels like I found the last puzzle piece I need. I then remembered his many slip-ups of the day. The times he would try to subconsciously push me away, the argument we had in the gym the other week. When he pushes me away it hurts. "Stop sending me mixed signals prick." I sighed as I turned my phone off letting it drop on my belly. I scrolled through my contacts and landed on Asahi, I need to talk to someone - I know I was an asshole of a friend but maybe he will listen.

I pressed call and waited to see if he would answer, it was late as hell slowly ticking round to being midnight. To my surprise he answered. "Asahi?" I asked as I heard his voice. 

"Well of course, you called me." He chuckled lightly on the other end of the phone, he sounded relaxed, as if I hadn't ignored him for over a week. I suddenly felt guilty.

"I'm sorry for ignoring you Asahi, I just ignore you and crawl back when it suits me - agh! I'm such a shit friend." I complained down the phone only to hear his sweet laughter ringing down the phone. "You're not mad?" I asked quietly, not sure how he would respond.

He laughed again, "No of course not Suga, you're my best mate. I can't stay angry forever you know." I could feel his smile through the line. I could hear his relief at us officially making up and I felt a sense of relief wash over my as well. "You wanna talk about something?" He asked kindly, I nodded, knowing he couldn't see it but I needed to think about how to phrase it.

"I do, but give me a minute, I'm going to sit in my garden." I told him as I gently put my phone on the side as I threw on my pyjamas and a fluffy dressing gown - feeling the relief around my chest as I took the binder off. I threw on my fluffy slippers and recollected the phone as I went outside to sit on the swinging bench. "I'm outside." I said happily as I gently rocked the bench back and forth, allowing myself to relax into the momentum. 

I heard a door close on his end of the phone, I'm guessing he is following suit - I guess it is rather late to be calling indoors. "So, what's up?" He asked. I smiled to myself, the relief of talking to a friend finally feeling normal again.

"We can talk about me in a bit! I want details on you and the libero first!" I cheered down the phone, kicking my feet up off of the ground and letting the swing sway. He sighed on the other end. I grinned accomplished in finally prying information out of him.

"I should have known you'd be clawing for details soon enough." I could hear his face palm through the phone, it made me giggle. I couldn't wait for the details, the stories, the tales of dates they'd already had, dates he had planned. The cute things, everything - wanted to know every scrap of information he could give me. Maybe indulging in his relationship would distract me from Daichi. I ended up letting out a groan as I thought back to Daichi, and of course Asahi heard it. "Hey, no we are talking about that first! I promise to give you details but first we are talking about why Sugawara is making those unhappy sounds." He said sounding like a parent. It is fun when the roles swap and he ends up being the mum friend rather than me, allowing me a safe to feel safe and vulnerable. "Oh thanks Noya." I heard, it sounded like he had tried to muffle the sound but I heard it. So he was with Noya! 

We began to talk, I told him I was trans - knowing I was already out but somehow just telling him felt like a weight lifted from my shoulders, we had a good talk, some good laughs. Occasionally Noya could be heard passing Asahi a cup of tea or something. They seemed sweet together but then the subject changed to Daichi.