Damned but mine

Chapter 49 SPECIAL POV

ROSIE

SPECIAL POV

My life? Is this really my life right now?  Staring at the mirror early when I wake up used to feel great, so great that taking pictures were never a burden. I used to feel beautiful, special, admired, but now the only person that I actually felt beautiful with—that use to tell me plenty of times how beautiful I am is with someone else. Sighing softly, I grab the mirror next to me and bring it up to my face, staring at the supposed injuries I claim to have, "That fucking trash!" I shout loudly, breathing heavily now, laughing at nothing as I finger comb my hair backwards.

Since we were little we used to be close friends, best of friends if I could say so and when we began dating, I saw myself slowly drifting into the world of fame. I was worried about the clothes I wear, how my face looked that suddenly I began seeing myself using Nick as nothing but a jewellery. He didn't have enough money like I did, he didn't wear expensive clothes like I did but he had a feature no one else had—his handsome face. Just as he was madly in love with me then, I was only seeing myself using him because then, I would be untouchable, no one else would be at my level.

When he told me he was leaving and brought up the suggestion of long distance relationship, I had completely forgotten that this was the same boy who I spent all my life with, my best friend since I was five and that was why I didn't feel nothing when I broke up with him, obviously he was already leaving, I just needed to find another match even though none of them were on his level but day after day, everywhere began getting boring without him. I still remember the first day I moved here and saw him, I still remember how my smile was, I could even consider it to be my widest smile but something inside me broke when he said he was dating here. That day I was so frustrated, angry but with a huge smile on my face, I try my best not to show it.

"I did wrong?" I scoff, applying the lip gloss on my lip. What did they expect? That I would just forget him and move on? "Idiots! For who exactly? That lowlife. Her world can't even be compared to mine, never."

She's in this world to be considered useless, I mean she herself even think it's useless so her words, not mine. I'm Rosie, a queen but recently I don't even see myself as on when all I time I see him with her—I call him, he with her. I need him, he's with her. Honestly, it drives me crazy how I've heard her name more from his mouth mine. "That bitch." I breath out, biting hard on my lower lip that I even thirst blood. I'm the one he's known all his life, we've done I all, we've been friends, best friends and lovers but when he's with her, I always feel like trash.

"But not for long." I chuckle, tossing the mirror back to the bed. I'll make sure Nick remembers every reason, even the most tiny reason why he couldn't let me go back in Chicago. I'll make him remember the moment he cried when I broke up with him, I'll make him remember what is like to love me, I'll make him fall in love with me all over again.

Nick just left the hospital minutes ago but I couldn't help staring into space, laughing loudly as I remember all the sweet words I had told him earlier about how I would be nice to his girlfriend now. Tears began coming out of my eyes due to excessive laughing, it's funny how he really thinks I meant all of that. "Is he even concerned about me?" I touch my cheeks, remembering all the slaps I received on them. "Or he only just came here to let me know what a good person that selfish fuck is."

My smile drops suddenly, "How can he even think that? I'm the victim here, I'm the one that had my face turned into a rag but again he only cares about her, that's just..."

"Rosie!" Hearing my aunty's loud voice, my lips quickly curve up like the moon. The door swings open and at once she rushes inside. Her eyes quickly widens as she approaches me with four doctors behind her. She face palms me, having a good look at me face, "What the hell happened to your face?" With that question, I thought this could be a good way to finally get rid of Melanie, my aunty is a lawyer and if she ever heard that it was a mere trash that touched my face, she's definitely sueing, even if it's the bare minimum but putting Nick first, he may never forgive me if I did that.