Daydream

XVII

I laid in bed with Mel late at night almost an hour after he had gotten off work. I looked down at him as his head laid on my stomach. "You don't have work tomorrow?" I asked rubbing his head. "Nope." He said rubbing my thigh. "We can have date night tomorrow." He said happily. "Where?" I asked smiling. "Mmm maybe the arcade." He said grabbing his phone. "Or roller coasters." He said chuckling . He knew I loved riding roller coasters but I could never help throwing up once we got home. I laughed to myself as he sat up. "You're not funny." I said playfully. "But you laughing." He said smirking leaning down close to my lips. "Be quiet." I said turning my head. He chuckled grabbing my face turning my head so I was facing him, kissing me. Before we could get carried away he pulled away from my lips letting my face go. He sighed laying down next to me.

"No play?" I said in a fake shocked tone. "I'm tired." He said laughing pulling me into his arms. I noticed that Mel hasn't been pouncing on me lately like he usually does. This new work schedule must've been taking a toll on his energy. I sat up slightly so I was looking down at him. I leaned in kissing his neck a few times before moving up to his lips. "Tomorrow then?" I asked pulling away, wrapping my arms around him. "Mhmm." He hummed. I laid my leg across his waist laying my head on his chest. "You okay?" Mel asked suddenly. "Yea." I said looking up at him. "Why?" I asked a little confused. "Just thought about how you were acting this morning." He mumbled. I slid my hand up his shirt a little to his torso trying to distract myself from wanting to start fidgeting. "No I'm okay really." I said softly feeling guilt take over me. I could've said something just now. Then again this isn't the time honestly he's all tired and it would ruin the mood. "Okay good." He said wrapping his arm around my waist.

~

I sat in the living room staring at the tv. It was on but I wasn't really watching it because I was too busy thinking. Jay had texted me earlier and asked if we could meet up tomorrow but Mel would be home tomorrow. I should just tell Mel tomorrow since he'll be home. I have no reason not to. If I stop being nervous for one minute I'm sure I'll be able to tell him without it being something weird. I jumped slightly surprised hearing Mel call my name. I looked over seeing him coming into the living room. He looked upset. He also called me by my government name so there's no way he wasn't upset. I looked at his hands seeing he was holding my phone.

"Yes?" I said softly immediately fidgeting with my fingers. "Jay? Why'd he say this?" He asked calmly at first giving me my phone. I looked at my phone seeing a few notifications from Jay on my screen the top one asking what time I wanted us to meet. "He's just someone I'm doing work with." I said looking up at him. "You're meeting with him?" He asked raising his eyebrows. Before I could answer he was talking again. "This is Jay from college right?" He asked. "Yes but it-" He stopped me.

"You didn't tell me about this, why?" He asked. Whenever Mel was upset with me, which wasn't often, he asked a lot of questions. He had a bad habit of not letting me finish talking whenever we argued too. He's gotten better at managing that recently but now it was like he threw it all out the window.

"Because it wasn't that serious." I said shakily. "You know I don't like him." He said narrowing his eyes at me. "For absolutely no reason." I said. "You know why I don't like him." He said. "It's childish Mel, we're grown now." I said looking down at my hands. "So then why didn't you tell me?" He asked.

"It's my work, why do I have to tell you about everything I do?" I said looking back up at him starting to feel annoyance take over my nervous feelings. His face had no emotion on it. Why was he even looking at my phone? Not that he couldn't it was just a random thing for him to do because we never really did that kind of stuff. "You obviously didn't tell me on purpose because why wouldn't you? You tell me everything yet you didn't tell me about this, that doesn't make any sense." He said flatly. "Because I knew you would make it into something it's not." I said.

He chuckled shaking his head. "You know what, it's really whatever. You're right this is your work, I can't stop you from doing it so go head and keep meeting with this nigga." He said starting to sound a lot angrier than before. "Why are you so mad about this? Do you really think I would cheat on you?" I asked raising my eyebrows. "It's not about what I think you're going to do, it's him! I wouldn't put it pass him to try and do something with you!" He said starting to get loud.

"It's not that serious." I said shaking my head. "But if it was the other way around you would feel some type of way right?" He asked harshly. "It's just work!" I yelled at him starting to get angry.

"Why aren't you getting what I'm saying?!" He yelled back at me. "How are you going to try and tell me what I'm understanding? No Mel, I would not feel some type of way about you doing work with someone if it was just work!" I yelled back at him.

"So me doing work with my ex when I know you don't like her would be cool with you?" He asked putting his hands in front of him. "That's totally different because you guys actually had a relationship with mutual feelings, I've never felt further than friendship for Jay." I said. "Do you not trust me that much to not know that even if he tried something on me I wouldn't do anything with him?" I asked feeling hot tears brim my eyes. "This is not about my trust for you at all, you're not seeing this from my perspective! Why would I want some dude that I knew liked my girlfriend working with her now?!" He yelled at me stepping forward slightly. "You didn't even tell me about it, what the fuck was it a secret for?!" He yelled.

"I didn't tell you because why do you have to know all of my business?! If it isn't affecting you then what do I need to tell you for?!" I yelled standing from my place on the sofa. "It's common sense to tell the person you're in a relationship with these things!" He yelled back.

"I don't have to tell you every little thing I'm doing especially when it comes down to something I'm doing myself! If you're not involved in it why the fuck would I have to tell you?!" I yelled at him throwing up my hands. "No fuck all that! You didn't tell me because you knew you were wrong-" I cut him off. "See no you're not going to try and tell me how I feel when I never said that!" I yelled furrowing my eyebrows.

"Because you already know it's true!" He yelled back stepping towards me slightly again. "Mel what the fuck ever I don't even care anymore, this is all work I'm not fucking the nigga and it's not my place to tell him how he feels! Even if he does like me oh well, I wouldn't leave you to be with him!" I yelled at him. "You're being childish, still basing all of this on stuff that happened years ago, that's weird!" I added harshly walking pass him.

"If that's how you feel then man do what the fuck you want to! Go meet up with him, I'm not stopping you!" He yelled brushing past me going into the room. I stood there for a second blinking trying not to let the tears fall. I looked up at the ceiling wiping below my eyes with my finger tips hearing Mel grab keys off the hook. "Where you going?" I asked looking forward seeing him open the door. "Nowhere." He mumbled leaving. I took a deep breath trying to hold back the tears that wanted to fall. I was barely processing what had just happened. My hands were shaking from the amount of adrenaline and anger rushing in me. I walked into the room getting into bed trying to relax. Me and Mel never argued much because we never really had anything to argue about. If we ever argued it was over something trivial that could be fixed right on the spot. I don't remember the last time we argued like this though.

This was all just stupid. I groaned sitting up feeling tears fall down the side of my face. I sniffled wiping my eyes and face. It felt like my body was on fire and my heart was going to beat out of my chest. I really did hate arguing with him. It always got me way too heated. We both avoided it as much as possible by just talking things out but some things just aren't avoidable. I picked up my phone replying to Jay's message asking him if we could meet some other time. He replied quickly agreeing. I sighed putting down my phone. Where'd he even go? Why would he just up and leave like that without letting me know where he was going? I shook my head laying down on the pillow.

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I'm not gone lie y'all I be liking arguing LMAOOO like omg I sound toxic but I love arguing like okay let me read the fuck outta you and have you not knowing what to say back.

Sometimes it be the other way around but even when I get read I still like arguing cuz oh okay I'm in my place now lol