Our Wildhearts (James McVey, The Vamps)

Secrets About The Past

Delilah's P.O.V

The guys have arrived and we've had our first round of shots. Tilly is already half drunk but is raring to get the next shot down her neck so we take the next round of straight vodka.

"Ahh," Brad says through gritted teeth. "I always forget how much it burns your throat."

"Aww poor baby." Milly says as she hugs him and Brad pushes his bottom lip out as he nods his head. "Want a kiss better?"

"Uh huh." Milly smiles before gentle kissing Brad and he can't help but lift her up making her laugh. I look to James and his eyes say it all. That's what he wants to be in there position and we are, kinda.

"Guys, seriously, you're doing that here?" Connor asks as he stares at the floor.

"Oh, shit, sorry Connor..." Milly says as she removes herself from Brad's embrace. She makes her way over to Connor and hugs him tightly, "You'll find someone, don't worry." Milly says over his shoulder and she steals a glance at James and her face drops.

"Shall we play beer pong?" Tristan says before the awkward atmosphere lingers a little too long for his liking.

"Hell yeah!" Tilly shouts as she makes a dash for the lounge.

We all follow Tilly into the lounge but I stay back with James to grab the cups and alcohol.

"You okay?" I ask him and his eyes shoot up from the floor to look at me.

"Yeah, I'm fine." he replies bluntly as he snatches the cups from the side. He takes a sharp turn to leave but I grab his wrist.

"James..." I can feel the tears again, I hate crying, I hate people feeling fucking sympathetic about shit because I let a few tears roll down my cheeks. "I'll tell them, we'll tell them, together!"

James turns around and yanks his wrist in order to pull me close. "It's not that."

"What is it then?" I ask him through my tears which stain his light grey shirt.

"It reminded me."

"Of what?" I ask as I push myself away from his chest to look at him.

"Of us and how we used to be..." James lifts me onto the kitchen counter, "not giving a single fuck about who saw us together."

"James, I'm sorry, truly I am and I'll tell them tomorrow if I tell them now they probably won't remember in the morning."

"De, don't rush it; if you're not ready don't tell them."

"Okay..." James stands between my legs and slides his hands up my thighs and onto my waist where he wraps his arms around me causing my body to shift forward. He softly kisses my neck with his delicate lips before I push his shoulders back making him look at me. I pull his chin towards me and gently press my lips on his after we pull away, I whisper "I love you." in his ear as a single tear slides down my cheek.

James takes my head in his hands and wipes the tear away before looking me in the eye and saying "I love you too, Delilah Rose May." James pecks my cheek as a smile dances across my lips. "Let's go into the lounge before they get too restless." and with this said James pulls me off the counter and the two of us grab the stuff before we go into the lounge. The others are nattering between themselves not noticing the fact that we never arrived in the room.

"Right, guys shall we get started?" James asks and everyone goes silent as they stare at James.

"Hell yeah!" Tilly yells and everyone cheers.

I hadn't noticed until now but Connor isn't in the room so as the others get their stuff together I sneak away to look for him. It doesn't take me long to find him sat on my bed in my room upstairs staring at the old picture of me and my grandpa that I carry around with me everywhere I go. Cautiously I take a seat next to him and as I do I gaze at him but he makes no attempt to look at me.

"You were close," Connor says continuing stare at the picture intensely, "is he your granddad?"

"Grandpa, yeah." I answer quietly.

"You know how I know?" Connor looks up at me a tear glistening in his eye as I shake my head in reply. "The way you're looking up at him, laughing, and he's holding you close to him as you sit on his lap." Did I ever tell you that I fucking hate crying, the tears roll down my cheeks and Connor snaps me round and hugs me tightly. "I'm sorry, De; I didn't mean to make you cry..."

"It's okay, it's not your fault. You didn't know." I pull away and Connor wipes the tears off my cheeks.

"You don't have to answer but where is he now?"

"In my memories...and he'll stay there forever until the day I live in someone else's."

"Oh, sorry."

"He meant so much to me and loosing him was the worst experience of my life so far...he always looked out for me and helped me through everything be it a small thing or something massive."

"De...you don't..."

"No." I snap bluntly and Connor jolts back shocked, "I have to I can't keep it in anymore! I lost one of the most important people in my life to a shitty disease called cancer, leukaemia to be precise. My grandpa wasn't just a grandpa; he was my best friend when I had nobody; he was my number one fan when I had none; he was my teacher when others refused to give me the time of day."

"What did he teach you?" I suddenly realise what I've just said and I freeze. "De? What did your grandpa teach you?"

"He er...he..." I stumble on my words before finally, "he taught me to sing."

"I didn't know you sing."

"That's because I don't, not anymore." I look down at my lap and twiddle my thumbs, "I stopped because of him, the man."

"What man?" Connor asks and he shuffles closer to me.

"The man who stabbed me. I'd met him before the last incident. I used to busk in Manchester every Saturday without fail and one day he put a letter in my guitar case telling me that he thought I was shit but I bumped into him along a back alley and he knocked me out cold. The next morning I woke up in the same spot I fell in and a few weeks later I saw him again only this time he wanted something else."

"De, I'm so sorry that happened to you..." Connor says to me as he takes my hand. "Did he...rape you?"

"...yes."
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Woah that's some big news there so I'm going to leave you to think about that...
Love y'all heaps, enjoy your week's, Finola!😘