4 Maybe

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It wasn't long before I heard footsteps moving slowly in my direction. I shouldn't have been surprised by this, and yet after my actions I hadn't expected it.

"Hey Y/N. Are you okay? Do you want to talk about it?" I heard Damian ask, who was now standing in the narrow strip of light, looking down at me worriedly.

I took a trembling breath and wrapped my arms around my knees. I knew I had to talk about it, but I didn't know if I was capable of it.

"I... I don't know if I can... It has to do with my past... And I've... I've never told anyone before." I whispered as I just looked straight ahead.

"Maybe it would help you to talk about it. It might do you some good to let it out," Damian replied, sinking to the floor a few steps away from me. 

"I actually thought I had gotten over it. I promised myself that I would never put myself in that kind of situation again. That's probably why I'm generally so distant and cold. What I do is... I tell myself that I don't have time or patience for any games. It's easier when people think you're arrogant or just a bitch than to open up.

But... something changed last week. When you caught me before I could hurt myself more... I suddenly felt things that I thought I had buried so deep inside me that they couldn't possibly come to the surface again." I babbled on. But I didn't look at him. I just couldn't bring myself to do it.

"I had this tingling feeling. Something I've never felt like this before. I decided to get some clarity. Hence the kiss. And please don't get me wrong, it was great, but in that second, everything came back. Everything I'm scared of. Everything bad that I tried with all my power to forget. I know it has nothing to do with you. You just triggered it. That... that kiss reminded me of how it can be. And that scared the crap out of me.

Maybe I was right to never risk it again. I am bruised or possibly even broken. I have no idea. I'm sorry you had to experience that. And I understand if you want to avoid me from now on," I continued quietly.

"Y/N, you should know by now that I don't give up that easily. And in case it wasn't already clear... I like you. And I don't care if you think you're damaged or whatever. We all have a past and we all have issues to deal with. But that doesn't mean we have to do it all on our own. All I need from you, Y/N, is the will to fight! And I know you are a fighter, because whatever happened to you... you are still standing. You fell down and yet you got up again," he replied.

Now I looked at him and there was so much understanding and seriousness in his eyes. My feeling told me that he was serious. But I wasn't sure how much I could rely on my feelings.

He was right about one thing though. I was still there! Everything that had happened to me had not managed to destroy me.

"I want to try to trust you, but... it might take a while. That is... if you still want to..." I stammered.

"Of course I do. I never give up without a fight and I think you are worth the fight. I just feel that there is something between us. And I understand that you need time. So what do you say we start as friends... small steps?" Damian said and held out his hand to me.

I looked at him and thought about it all. Then I closed my eyes and took a deep breath before exhaling with a deep sigh. Carefully, I put my trembling hand in his and then looked into his eyes.

There it was again. The tingling feeling with which the whole mess began. Maybe it really could be something special.

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