Dogwood Heights

The Breakdown

Toni

I hung up the facetime with Marquis and went to check on shakyla. She was sleeping so I decided I'd check on her later.  I left locking her door and began walking home. When I got home I opened the door and went to my room. My mom was nowhere in sight . I kinda wanted to talk to her because I felt bad.
I went to my closet and began sorting clothes . Half of the closet was stuff I've never worn . I'm basically set on clothes for the rest of freshman year.

I did a little cleaning, and made my room look nice. After I'd gotten done I felt a little light headed.  I knew what was next so I ran to the bathroom in the hall bursting through the door.  I made it to the toilet just in time for the hot, burning, throw up to come up . I threw up for a about 2 minutes straight.

When I was done I rested my head on the toilet seat. I turned towards the tub and saw a hand dangling from inside the shower curtain.

I snatched back the curtain to see my mother's weak body lying in the tub. I knew she'd overdosed because of the rubber strap around her arm and the broken needle in the side of the tub.

"Oh fuck." I grabbed her arm and pulled her out of the tub but was stopped when I realized she was cold. No no no. She can't be dead.  I shook her trying to make her wake up.  Tears slowly rolled down my face as I really took in what was going on.

"mamaaaa! " I yelled smacking her face. No response.

"Please mama. Please. I'm so sorry mama, just please don't go. " I cried trying to use water to wake up.  After 10 minutes of crying and trying to get her to wake up, I gave up.  I laid my mother gently on the bathroom floor and took off to the living room phone.

"9-1-1 what's your emergency?" The operator asked.

"My-- mama .... I .... help me ." I said struggling to speak . By now I was breathing really fast and was getting light headed. 

"Sweetheart I need you to calm down I cannot help you if you don't tell me what's wrong. " She said . I held the phone catching my breathe for a quick minute before putting the phone back to my ear.

"My mama overdosed.  Please come help me. " I Explained.

"Where are you?" She asked.  I gave her my address and building number and she said they'd be on the way.

Soon enough the ambulance pulled up and right behind them was the coroner's truck. I lost it and had a tantrum.  I know it's childish but I can't take it again.  it's too much.  One of the paramedics tried to calm me down while the other went into the bathroom to attempt to help my mama. 

"She's Done. Send in the Coroner." The Paramedic in the bathroom yelled.  On question the coroner's crew came in with the plastic black bag and the stretcher.  I fell to the ground and cried on my knees.

A few moment later they wheeled the stretcher past me with the zipped, Black, bag on it. 

"Wait." I yelled as everyone stopped. I got up and went to the bag and unzipped it.  My mother had turned blue and purpleish. I brushed her hair out of her face and wiped the old sweat off of her.  I looked at her for a while before I let them zip her back up and take her away. 

When her body was gone A police man came in. He explained to me that iv was underage and could not stay alone.  I needed a adult to move in or if have to move out with a relative or be given to the state. 

"You have 24 hours to figure something out.  We'll send someone out tomorrow to make sure you're living properly. " The Lady cop Said then she left. 

I sank down in the couch and took a deep breath. Why me. 

"This isn't fair!" I yelled.  I picked up the nearest thing which was a lamp and threw it into the tv making it shatter into pieces.  I flipped the glass coffee table making it break. I Started grabbing everything that was breakable and throwing it. I went and got a knife and cut up the leather sofa. When I was done the living room was a complete mess Glass and cotton from the sofa was everywhere.