Many ask, what side would you have been on if you were involved in that Civil War thingy?
I mean, that was probably the gayest civil war to ever happen, two men fighting over another man. It was when I pointed this fact out to my dads that the initial debate begun.
"Let me give you a hypothetical.." Tony said, sitting opposite me, "If you had of been recruited when we went head to head, who's side would you have been on?" He asked.
"I would have been like 13, almost 14.." I responded.
"Your avoiding the question.." Steve said, doing that thing with the chair he did in the detention video. You know the 'bad boy' sitting position.
If I could count the amount of times if seen that detention video.
"I don't even know what the whole thing was over. Until now I thought it was you all wanted to fuck Bucky.." I said, pointing to the robot that was making coffee.
"So did I.." Bucky muttered.
"Your ego astounds me.." I said, turning to see him.
"It's a talent.." He smiled, placing a cup of coffee in front of me.
"Thank you dad.." I smiled before returning to the conversation.
"Back to the conversation, how have you been here for almost four years and know nothing about our um, disagreement.." Steve asked.
"Old news? Your cat fight wasn't really relevant.." I explained.
With that, they spent the next hour explaining the ins and outs of there bitch fest, even calling Nat in to give an unbiased point of view.
"So, who's side are you on?" They asked by the end of the chat.
"Well, your both idiots-"
"What?!" Steve yelled.
"Excuse me?!" Tony said at the same time.
"You both had the right idea, but lack brain cells when coming to a rational conclusion!" I said, accepting another cup of coffee produced by Bucky.
"That's just uncalled for-" Steve yelled.
"Bitch you lost your sponsorship with American when you became a literal war criminal!" I rebutdtaled.
"So you would of been on my team?" Tony asked.
"Hell no. You voluntarily signed your team up to be a government hit squad!" I responded.
"I guess I did.." Tony mumbled.
"So who's team are you on?" Bucky asked, adoring the drama.
"Well, I guess I'm on moms team-" I tried to explain.
"THATS NOT A LEGITIMATE TEAM!" Tony yelled.
"THATS ILLEGAL!" Steve screamed at the same time.
"She is the only one who sort of makes sense. She signed the accord thingys for peace and still tried to keep the team together. She didn't actually wanna sign those papers, where as the 'genius' did.." I spoke.
"So, she is a legitimate team?" Tony turned and asked Steve.
"I guess so.." He said, still trying to process the facts I had just spit.
"Any other questions for me, because I wanna watch Loki shift into random people they see on the street and then bump into them same people. The confusion is always so amazing.." I smiled.
"Who has the best beard, Steve or me?" Tony asked, rubbing his hand in his beard like he was fucking Santa Clause.
"Eh, I don't know how I'm rating this, is it on how much of a dilf it makes you?" I asked.
"A what?!" Steve said in confusion.
"Sure, let's go with that.." Tony said, understanding my language.
"Um, someone once called Steve a 'mega dilf' and someone once asked me if my dad was 'single and interested', so let's say currently Steve is better.." I called out.
"Fuck!" Tony said in frustration.
"Watch your language!" Steve turned to say,
"For that language thing, now Tony wins.." I said before leaving.
In the end, we should never lose friends over which team people are on, because life keeps moving and wars keep happening. So stand with me on the unproblematic side of team Nat.
I mean at least she doesn't go into Tony and Steve's secret meetings, now they have that fucking wizard in on it too. I really wanna know what them hoes are talking about.
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The Gen-Z Avenger (One-Shots!)
FanfictionMaybe recruiting a teenager girl was one of their better ideas. When the Avengers decided to recruited a member of Gen-z, they knew not everything would be sunshine and rainbows. Little did they know, Y/N was the funniest thing that could ever happe...
